Relationship advices

In a two-year relationship, they haven't met each other's families due to concerns about her dating someone of a different race. She is 21, and he is 24.

My girlfriend (21F) is about to graduate as a senior in her undergraduate studies, while I (24M) am in my first year of a master's program. We both come from the same town and high school. We’ve been together for two years, and only her two sisters know about our relationship since her family doesn’t approve of men of color. This situation has been really difficult for me. She believes that if her family finds out, they might stop supporting her financially with tuition, rent, and food, which is why she’s hesitant to tell them. I honestly think it wouldn’t be as bad as she fears, but her anxiety complicates things. I've struggled to convince her, leading to a lot of tension between us. I only learned about her family dynamics three months into our relationship, but I believed we could work through it, expecting things would get better by now. It pains me to consider giving her an ultimatum since I can see how hard this is for her. She feels torn, too. With her graduation approaching this semester, I made it clear that I won’t miss it, even if her entire family is there. I have two undergraduate degrees and am pursuing my master’s while working full-time, and I feel like I deserve to be acknowledged in our relationship. I genuinely love her and have always thought she was "the one," but this family issue and her anxiety have made it difficult to envision a future together, especially beyond her graduation. I would appreciate any advice from anyone who has been in a similar situation. I know some may suggest that I should walk away, while others might encourage me to fight for our love. I'm truly interested in hearing if anyone has faced something like this in today’s world and how it turned out. Has anyone gone through something similar?

Best friend and boyfriend

I’m a 19-year-old female and I’m currently dating a 21-year-old guy. We used to date in high school, but we broke up and lost touch for three years. Recently, we managed to reconnect and get back together. He just revealed to me that six months after our breakup, he kissed my best friend, who is 20 now. He mentioned they were both drunk and quickly realized it was a mistake, but it really hurts to know that this happened while we were friends. Now, two and a half years later, I’m just finding out about it, and I’m unsure how to react or if I should confront him about it. What hurts the most is that she chose not to tell me. Should I be concerned about this, or is it something I should let go?

My boyfriend, who is 20, had to move in with me after being kicked out. He has now been allowed to return home after 8 months. Should I continue the relationship?

For context, I have a daughter who isn't his. I've genuinely loved our time living together, and it's heartbreaking that we can't be together anymore. He seems to get frustrated when I express my sadness about it, and he isn't bringing up any future plans for us to live together again.

My boyfriend was unfaithful to his previous girlfriend and kept it a secret. I'm not sure how to feel about this.

I'm in a new relationship that has been going on for a couple of months. On our first date, he was very open with me and wanted to address any 'red flags.' He admitted to cheating on his ex-girlfriend but only revealed it to her after they broke up. Initially, I appreciated his honesty, but as someone who struggles with trust issues, this information is difficult for me to digest. Since then, he's shared more about the situation, and what I've learned is concerning. He was just 21 at that time, and while I understand that young people can make mistakes, he had been in a relationship with his girlfriend for roughly two to three years. He cheated with one of her closest friends, who lived with them. It started when they were alone together, had a few drinks, and things escalated from there. This incident happened a few more times because they wanted to explore if there were any feelings between them, which they ultimately decided there weren’t. As far as I know, they continued living together for a while after that. He chose not to tell his girlfriend about the cheating, fully aware of the likely consequences. He kept it a secret until he was 27, claiming he 'struggled with guilt for years' but assured me that he would never cheat again because he cannot bear that guilt. However, I recently found out that he only told his ex about the affair because she confessed to cheating on him and had developed feelings for another guy (who she is currently with). At that moment, he still didn't come clean until he sensed she was torn between the two of them and might choose to give their relationship another shot. He felt it was necessary to finally be honest with her, resulting in her ending things, which I completely understand. It seems that both of them contributed to a messy and toxic situation. She was almost ten years older and deeply entrenched in their relationship, while he was much younger. At least she was honest about her feelings, whereas he kept his secret for years, and that's something I struggle to reconcile. I also get the impression that he sees himself as the victim in their relationship. While it's true she left him for someone else, I can't help but think that if he had been upfront, she might have made a different choice sooner. He expresses frustration at her for not giving him a chance to fix things, which feels a bit like an excuse to me. So here I am, with a boyfriend who cheated when he was younger and kept it hidden for years. Now at 29, I don't want to hold his past mistakes against him, but I'm genuinely concerned, and it weighs on me. I've tried to communicate that this is challenging for me, but he seems to think he is being punished for something he did in his early 20s. While I can acknowledge that he made a mistake, his attitude surrounding it worries me. I really like him and want to give him a chance, and I believe him when he says he wouldn’t cheat again. But I can’t shake the fear that it will impact me in the future.

Does my girlfriend still have feelings for her previous relationships?

This is my first post, so please go easy on me! I’m not great with tech, so I might be overthinking things. I’m a 25-year-old guy and she’s a 21-year-old girl. We’ve been dating for three months. Recently, she lent me her MacBook since mine was broken and I was waiting for a new one. While she stepped out, I accidentally looked through her photos. I found images of her old exes, and there are also some exes in her favorites. Now, I’m wondering with all this iCloud photo syncing—when I delete photos from my iPhone, do they automatically get deleted from her Mac? I just tried it on my new Mac, and photos I delete from my iPhone don’t get removed from the Mac. Am I overreacting, or has she kept these for a reason? I could really use some advice, because I'm feeling a bit lost!

As a 19-year-old male, I feel that my 19-year-old girlfriend might not be sexually attracted to me.

I want to start by saying how much I care for my girlfriend. We’ve been together for nearly two years, and overall, it’s been a positive experience. About seven or eight months ago, I mentioned to her that I felt she wasn’t physically attracted to me since she rarely initiates anything or shows any desire for me. This is really important to me; it’s not about the physical aspect as much as it is about the emotional connection. When she expresses her desire for me, it makes me feel valued. She assured me that she would work on it. A couple of months later, I brought it up again, and she responded by saying that I wasn’t meeting her needs, which prevented her from meeting mine. She mentioned that I hadn’t been taking her on enough dates and that I hadn’t given her enough. I understood her perspective and made an effort to improve by planning more dates and surprising her with flowers and little gifts. Despite these efforts, I didn’t see any change in her behavior. After another couple of months, I brought it up again, and she became emotional, apologizing like before and promising to work on things, but again nothing changed. Now, several months have passed without any intimate connection, which isn’t the main issue for me—it’s the lack of expression of desire that stings. I feel like I’ve made changes for her, but she hasn’t reciprocated. I can envision a future with her if things improve, but I’m unsure how much longer I can endure this situation. I’m feeling myself drift away, and it feels like my concerns haven’t had any impact. I’m looking for advice: am I being unreasonable for feeling this way? TL;DR: My girlfriend doesn’t express physical desire for me, which makes me feel unwanted. I’ve addressed it three times, but despite my efforts to change based on her feedback, she hasn’t made any changes.

Is it possible that some changes are needed? (21F and 20M)

**TL;DR:** I need to come to terms with some boundaries in my relationship that feel off but aren't necessarily unusual. I (21M) and my partner (20M) have been together for nearly two years, and our relationship is generally good—no major fights, just the usual minor disagreements. However, I've noticed that our approach to sexual activity has become a bit uncomfortable for me. I enjoy being intimate with him, but I'm not always in the mood. When I don’t feel like it, he might express that he’s feeling horny or wants to be intimate. Instead of outright saying “no,” which feels odd given our relationship, I often say things like “I’m not sure” or “I’m tired.” Sometimes he continues to push for it. While he never physically forces anything, his actions—like touching himself if I turn away—make me feel pressured to respond, which can be difficult. It’s led me to want to avoid being alone with him, not because I'm afraid of him, but because I dislike how he sometimes persuades me into something I’m not sure I want to do. I'm unsure if this is a serious issue I need to address or just something that comes with being in a relationship.

My boyfriend of two years didn't give me anything for Christmas.

I purchased the Nike shoes he wanted for $100. He mentioned that my gift was on the way and would arrive on December 20th since he ordered it online. Now it’s January 30th, and I haven’t received anything, nor has he provided any updates. I think it’s fair to conclude that there’s probably nothing coming. What does this indicate about our relationship and his feelings? I haven't received anything—not even a card or a $2 chocolate.

Is this incorrect of me?

I (19M) and my girlfriend (19F) have been together for nearly a year, and our anniversary is coming up soon. However, I'm starting to feel like I don't want to continue the relationship. Her mood seems to influence everything around us. When she's unhappy, it feels like no one can be. **She spends all her time on her phone,** often doing things that seem trivial, like checking her friends' Snapchat locations or scrolling through Instagram. She insists on having my Life360 location shared all the time, and she frequently tries to instigate arguments because I don't post pictures of her on Instagram. Additionally, I've caught her going through my phone without permission on several occasions. She also doesn't have a job, and when I'm not with her, she tends to just stay in bed all day. Even when I'm at her place, we mainly just lie around doing nothing. Is it wrong for me to want more from this relationship? I want a girlfriend who’s excited to go out and do things with me, who listens to what I say, and isn’t preoccupied with social media. Things are relatively okay between us at the moment, so I feel guilty about the idea of ending things. Should I break up with her? Any advice would be greatly appreciated.

Am I considering divorce?

I'm a 33-year-old woman, and my 32-year-old husband and I have been experiencing some really tough months. He has a close friendship with a female coworker, and I've expressed my discomfort about her texting him daily. To sum it up, he made me feel like I was being jealous or needy for bringing it up, until the work Christmas party when she revealed that she has feelings for him. This situation isn't just a one-time mistake; it seems to be a recurring pattern for him. We've been together for 13 years and have two young kids, ages 6 and 4. Throughout his various jobs, he has developed close friendships with female colleagues. I want to clarify that I genuinely believe he hasn't cheated on me. We have each other's phone passwords, and I don’t think he would betray me in that way. However, he has hurt me by disregarding my feelings and continuing behaviors that make me uncomfortable. We're currently going through a separation, and he plans to move out soon. I'm coming to terms with the idea of not being together, as I’ve felt lonely for quite some time. He and I don’t seem to be on the same page when it comes to intimacy, and he doesn’t show much affection. Despite this, I still have lingering doubts about whether we should try to work things out. I recognize deep down that we may need to separate, but I can’t help but wonder if I’m making the wrong choice.

Is he rushing things, or am I just not good at dating?

I've been chatting online with a guy who's 30 for about four days now, and we definitely clicked during our phone conversations. However, there's one issue that's been bothering me: he's very eager to meet up in person. He's asked me every day since we started talking, wanting me to drive two hours to "hang out." I've told him it's too soon for me, but he continues to push the idea. Now he seems to think I'm not really interested in him. Is it normal for people to want to meet so quickly after connecting online? Am I the only one who feels this way?

I'm starting to feel uneasy about my boyfriend's new coworker.

I've been in a relationship with my boyfriend for just over five years now. Recently, he received a promotion, and they brought in a much younger woman to fill his previous role. Ever since, I've been sensing some unusual vibes. To start, after her interview, she privately messaged him to thank him personally, even though there were two other managers involved in the hiring process. She invited him to reach out if he needed anything and expressed excitement about hearing back from them. He replied, complimenting her interview skills. I want to clarify that I wasn't snooping; I was sitting right next to him when he responded. I find it a bit unprofessional for a candidate to reach out like that instead of sending a standard thank-you email, and when I mentioned it, he became defensive. They've been exchanging texts throughout the week, which is understandable since they'll be coworkers moving forward. He hasn't hidden much of what she's said, but some of their conversations seem a bit flirty. I also noticed him looking her up on Instagram, which he rarely does. Given her age and attractiveness, many of her photos are revealing or feature her posing in the gym, which makes me uneasy. With her training starting soon, they'll be spending a lot of time together, and it's increasing my anxiety. For context, I've never felt this way about any other girl or situation during our relationship—this is a first for me. I'm not quite sure how to approach this. He isn't outright hiding anything, but after a couple of weeks of working together, she's begun calling him "papa," which strikes me as odd. I'm unsure how to express my discomfort without coming off as jealous.

Hey girls, I need some advice—I'm starting to feel like my boyfriend isn't interested in helping me wrap things up.

Ladies, do you relate to this? When you're being close with your partner but end up satisfying yourself—do you feel any shame about it? Like you're the only one putting in the effort to reach that moment?

My girlfriend (21F) is interested in having group sex with other men, but I'm not comfortable with that. What should I do?

I've been in a relationship with my girlfriend for seven years, and she means the world to me. I can't fathom life without her. However, during a conversation about our future yesterday, the topic of sex came up, and she unexpectedly mentioned her desire to have a threesome with another guy. Initially, I thought she was joking since she's usually quite reserved, but it became clear that she was serious. I was taken aback because years ago, we had discussed this, and she had been adamant that she would never consider it. Now, she was expressing how incredible it might feel to be "filled" by other men and even said she fantasized about being "overwhelmed" by multiple guys. She was quite drunk at the time, while I had only sipped a little, as I've never been a fan of drinking. When she fell asleep, I found myself consumed by thoughts of what she had said. The idea of my future wife being with other men while I watched filled me with sadness and anxiety, and I could barely hold back tears as I sat there, my hands shaking. The next day, I asked her if she truly meant what she had said. I tried to approach the subject in an open manner, hoping she would feel comfortable sharing her thoughts. She confessed that she wanted to explore more experiences because we’ve been together for most of our lives, and neither of us has been with anyone else. This made me question whether she was dissatisfied with our sex life. I believe I perform well; we use toys, and she certainly reaches multiple orgasms. Yet here we are. The woman I envisioned as the future mother of my children is now expressing a desire to be with other men, and that’s something I cannot accept. Just last month, I secured a well-paying job and was considering buying her an extravagant ring, but now I’m reconsidering everything. I conveyed my feelings to her, but she seemed taken aback by my reaction. When she brought up the topic again during dinner, I lost my appetite entirely. This situation is incredibly challenging for me. I don’t feel like I have anyone to confide in, so I’m turning to this forum in search of some guidance.

25-year-old female, 28-year-old male: my boyfriend changed our screensaver.

Lately, I've been feeling a bit out of sorts, especially after my boyfriend came over to take care of me while I was sick. He brought me food and kept me company while I worked on my college assignments, which I genuinely appreciated. I even made him some food since he only brought a little for me. However, during our time together, I noticed something strange—he changed his screensaver of us back to his original one. This felt hurtful and made me wonder if he was concealing something or if he simply didn’t want anyone to see it. This observation led to an argument. He insisted that he has every right to change his screensaver whenever he wants and didn't think he needed my permission. He pointed out that the core of our discussion stemmed from my issues and said it was on me to express if I wanted him to keep the picture of us. He also mentioned that conveying this through anger and emotions wasn’t acceptable. I’m concerned I might be coming across as overly negative. Am I reading too deeply into this situation? I acknowledge my part in how I managed my feelings, but I still feel uneasy, particularly since he has a female friend visiting from abroad and they're planning to hang out this Saturday. It’s hard not to wonder if his decision to change the screensaver is connected to that, especially since he hadn’t changed it until now.

Ways to show love to my girlfriend

I'm facing a somewhat unique challenge in my relationship. My girlfriend and I (in a wlw relationship) have been navigating our different ways of expressing love. While we both cherish physical touch—even simple gestures like holding hands—things get a bit tricky when we're out in public. I struggle with anxiety and come from a strict, homophobic upbringing, which leads me to shy away from any public displays of affection. On the other hand, she enjoys showing affection openly and often feels down about my discomfort, although she makes an effort to understand my perspective. I'm looking for advice on how to make her feel loved in a way that aligns with both of our needs or how I can manage my anxiety about being queer in public. I live in a fairly accepting city, but it's hard to shake the habits I developed growing up. Any suggestions would be deeply appreciated!

I could use some assistance.

Hi, I’m a 19-year-old female, and my boyfriend is a 19-year-old male. We’ve been dating for about two months, and things seemed to be going well. We’re both college students, and our dorms are right across from each other, so he often stays over in my room. One night, he went out with friends and accidentally left his iPad behind. Since I know the password, I felt compelled to check it out, driven by an instinct. While looking through his iPad, I discovered he was communicating with some girls and even asking for their locations. Just to clarify, I attend college out of state, and I was away for Christmas break around that time. This is my first serious relationship, and I genuinely like him. When I confronted him about the messages, he claimed these girls were just friends from middle school, and I didn’t think much of it at the time because there was no obvious flirting. A few days later, I found myself going through his phone again and stumbled upon the "recently deleted" section in iMessage. There was a girl’s name listed with "808 messages deleted." Out of curiosity, I restored the messages and discovered it was his ex. She had reached out to him, and he responded. I can't help but feel hurt and confused, especially after crying to him about my concerns just recently. Looking further, I checked his call log and found they had FaceTimed each other. I couldn’t hold back the tears as he sat beside me. I decided to investigate his camera roll, and while he rarely takes pictures of us together, I found multiple images of her and even some hidden folders containing several explicit videos of them. I’m feeling utterly lost, disgusted, and angry, but I still care about him deeply. I really need some advice on what to do next!

I just discovered that my boyfriend has been smoking without telling me. Should I consider ending our relationship?

**The Title... Allow me to summarize the situation as succinctly as possible.** When my boyfriend and I first started dating, I was very clear about my strong negative feelings toward smoking and drug use due to some past trauma. In my previous relationship, my partner would force me to watch him get high and drunk, knowing it made me uncomfortable, which was incredibly hurtful. The smell of weed is especially triggering for me, as it brings back painful memories. I expressed that I couldn't have that in my life—not because I'm against everyone who partakes, but simply because of my own experiences and preferences. Recently, he has shared that he used to smoke but was committed to quitting for his health and our relationship, emphasizing that it means a lot to him and that he cares deeply for me. However, this past week, he has been unusually distant. There are stretches of time—up to 6 or 7 hours—when he doesn’t respond. We could be in the middle of a conversation, and then he just disappears. During our discussions, he mentioned feeling increased anxiety, having existential crises at night, headaches, and nausea. Today, I discovered that he has been smoking weed excessively for the past week, which is contributing to how he’s been feeling. Unfortunately, I learned this through a public online chat rather than from him directly, and that’s what hurts the most—his decision to hide it from me. Upon finding this out, I was overwhelmed with a panic attack; I was sobbing and struggling to breathe. It struck me that my reaction is deeply tied to my past experiences. The situation with my boyfriend is eerily similar to what I went through with my ex—the secrets, the mood swings from substance use—and I simply can't bear to go through that again. I usually address any issues or feelings directly with him, but right now, I feel paralyzed. I'm still crying and shaken, heartbroken. The thought that keeps echoing in my mind is, "I can't do this again." I refuse to endure another experience like the one with my ex, as it’s not worth it to me. In the end, my last relationship left me with growing resentment toward my ex. I realized that the drugs always seemed to take precedence over my comfort and values. I recognize that my emotions are currently quite chaotic and that I may not be thinking clearly. But all I can think to do right now is flee. At this moment, I can hardly look at him the same way...

Boyfriend (28M) Struggles with Boundaries (27F)

I'm a 27-year-old woman who recently experienced yet another breakup with my on-and-off boyfriend (28) after discovering he cheated on me—again. In response to the heartbreak, I began reaching out to other people and vented my frustrations about him to friends. When he learned about my messages, he ended the relationship, despite being the one who had been unfaithful. After a week apart, he returned and admitted he overreacted, expressing a desire to work things out. I still care for him and agreed to explore the possibility of reconciling, but I want to approach things differently this time. I made it clear that I don’t want us to slip back into old patterns right away. In past breakups, I tended to let things return to normal too quickly—like spending the night together and pretending nothing happened—without any real effort to change. So, I set a boundary: I’m open to dating and spending time together, but I don’t want to rush back into intimacy or overnight stays. (We just reconnected on Sunday). Instead of respecting my boundary, he’s pushing back against it. He outright told me that if I don’t "give in" on this issue, I shouldn’t be upset if he cheats again, implying that denying him intimacy would lead him to cheat. That statement really disturbed me. Tonight, I invited him to dinner because I still want to spend time together. At the end of the night, after walking me to my car, he asked if I was coming over. I reminded him of my boundary and declined. In response, he refused to kiss me goodnight and acted coldly towards me. Right now, I feel like he’s punishing me for wanting to take a thoughtful approach instead of rushing back into things. I don't believe I'm asking for too much—just some time and effort before we dive back in as if nothing happened. How can I maintain my boundaries while trying to rebuild trust with an ex who seems resistant to change?

I'm a 19-year-old woman, and I'm trying to figure out if my 19-year-old boyfriend lacks self-esteem or if he's just being a jerk.

My boyfriend has been texting several girls in a flirty manner on behalf of his male best friend to "help him find a potential partner." The conversations have turned out to be quite personal, which makes me wonder whether my boyfriend is simply naive or if he’s enjoying the chance to chat with other girls while in a committed relationship. I'd really appreciate some insight from guys on this too! 🕳👩‍🦯

I discovered my girlfriend discussing plans to leave me in some text messages.

I'm a 26-year-old guy, and my girlfriend is 25. We've been together for almost nine years, and like any relationship, we've had our ups and downs. Overall, I thought we were doing pretty well. We moved out of our parents' homes together at 17 or 18, and we both share a house along with our eight-year-old dog, who we raised together since he was a puppy. Every day after work, we take him for walks and visit parks. My girlfriend works from home in a job that involves computer work and meetings, although she sometimes has free time. She has a close friend from high school named Natalie, who lives five hours south, and occasionally, my girlfriend visits her and her two sisters for about a week at a time. Now, for the more complicated part. In July 2024, my girlfriend invited Natalie and her sisters over for a sleepover. They asked me to get them MDMA/molly, and I unwittingly agreed, thinking they just wanted to have some fun. However, they ended up spending four hours locked in the bathroom, giggling and whispering, while I sat downstairs feeling neglected and wanting to sleep. After trying to distract myself for too long, I finally lost my cool, banged on the door, and demanded to know what was going on. I accused them of being intimate in a jealous panic, and things escalated into a heated argument. After that night, my girlfriend and I struggled to rebuild trust. Months passed, and despite my attempts to work through it, she began threatening to break up with me over how I handled things that night. I've tried to adjust my schedule to align with hers so we can spend more time together, especially since the chilly weather makes early mornings challenging for me. Despite my efforts to prioritize her, she has grown increasingly distant over the last few months. Recently, I noticed her phone password had changed, which was unusual for us since we've typically shared that kind of information. When I discovered her new password, I snooped and found concerning text messages between her and Natalie. They were discussing potential rental applications and plans to leave me. This realization has left me feeling deceived and confused. Now, as Valentine's Day approaches, I'm conflicted about planning for it, knowing she seems to be plotting her exit. Friends around me suggest I let her go and focus on myself, but I feel like we've invested too much into our relationship to end it over one bad night. I worry about how our dog will react to such a big change. I'm seeking advice: Is this worth fighting for? Am I being irrational or unreasonable? Is she overreacting, influenced by her friend's opinions? What should I do in this situation? Any guidance would be appreciated before things escalate further. Thank you for your input.

What should I do? I would appreciate your help.

I'm a 23-year-old woman, and I've been in a relationship with my boyfriend, who is 26, for the past two years. Recently, a school friend of mine, who is 24 and lives overseas, called me while drunk and confessed that he has feelings for me. We've known each other for about ten years, and he was aware of my relationship, expressing regret for not confessing sooner and apologizing for his behavior. I shared everything with my boyfriend, who took it calmly and was understanding, emphasizing that my choices are what truly matters. My friend later texted to say he doesn't remember much of the conversation because he was so intoxicated. I haven't mentioned his confession to him yet. I genuinely enjoy the platonic friendship I have with this school friend and appreciate our occasional conversations. I would appreciate any advice on how to handle this situation. Thank you in advance!

What are the best ways to manage a long-distance relationship?

My girlfriend [18F] and I [18M] have been together for about two years, and in six months I’ll be moving away to pursue my master’s degree for the next four years. I know it might seem silly since we’re just teenagers and a long-distance relationship can be tough, but we both really want this to succeed. Unlike many relationships in our generation, we strive to handle our issues maturely and communicate openly—it's us against the world. Still, I can’t help but feel worried and a bit anxious about what the future holds. Does anyone have any advice on how we can make this work? I’m determined not to let go of this incredible opportunity. TLDR: Looking for tips on transitioning from being in the same town to a long-distance relationship.

19F, is it alright if I try to find my boyfriend, 20M, who suddenly disappeared after two months?

My boyfriend and I met in college, where I was a senior and he was a junior. I first noticed him at an event and developed a crush. After finding out his name, I ended up looking him up on social media. Despite being quite popular and having many followers, I took the plunge and texted him first. I'm generally shy and introverted, but we instantly clicked and quickly realized we had strong feelings for each other. We decided to start a relationship and went on several dates. Recently, however, he has become distant. He drinks and smokes, and one night while he was drunk, he broke down and revealed that he has a serious illness related to his addictions. It was a shock to see him show such vulnerability, as he’s usually quite reserved. When I pressed him for details, he was reluctant to share but did mention he was going to see a doctor the following day. When I asked him what the doctor said, he claimed everything was fine. Ever since that conversation, he has seemingly vanished. I’ve tried reaching out through calls, texts, and emails, but he hasn’t responded and is not even active on social media. He hasn’t blocked me, but it's as if he has just disappeared. This is puzzling, especially since he used to be very clingy and would struggle to go a day without talking to me. Now I’m left wondering if I should reach out to his friends to check on him. They don’t know me well; some are familiar, but most aren’t. Do you think he’s trying to distance himself from me? Should I make more effort to get in touch with him?

Any guidance would be appreciated.

My fiancé, who is 33, has lost interest in being intimate with me, and even in sharing kisses. I've noticed she spends an increasing amount of time on her phone, which has made me feel uneasy. This evening, I walked into the bathroom while she was taking a bath, and she quickly turned off what I suspect was a conversation on her phone. I sensed something was off, and after pressing her with questions, she admitted she had been watching lesbian porn to see if it aroused her. She’s also been engaging with people online and asking questions about how to determine if someone is a lesbian. I can't shake the feeling that there's more going on. She's been secretive about her phone, and when I requested to see some pictures, she hastily deleted them, claiming they were just selfies of her face, which I find hard to believe. Our relationship used to be strong, but ever since the birth of our daughter, who is now three, there have been noticeable changes in her behavior. For instance, she's recently started getting waxing, staying late at work, and even went for an unexpected walk to the store one night. She has agreed to start counseling, but I'm not sure what steps to take next. Any advice would be greatly appreciated.

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