Relationship advices

Developing feelings for someone new while attempting to move on from a past relationship.

It's been a year since my four-year relationship ended, and every day since has felt like a challenge. I can hardly believe it's been this long. The breakup was intensely painful, and not a single day goes by without thoughts of him and the sorrow he left behind. I've prayed countless times to let him go and move forward, but it hasn’t been an easy process. In the midst of this struggle, Phil, a friend from high school, came back into my life. We had already reconnected before my relationship fell apart, but he became my anchor in the aftermath. We bonded over our shared experiences of heartbreak and many other topics, and he turned into my pillar of support when I felt like I couldn’t rely on anyone else. The loss of mutual friends with my ex made Phil's friendship even more significant to me. As time went on, Phil and I grew exceptionally close. With him, everything feels effortless—comfortable and safe. We share so many laughs, and it’s been a long time since I experienced that kind of joy. However, I’ve started developing feelings for him, and that scares me. Given what I went through, the prospect of opening my heart to someone again, even someone as wonderful as Phil, feels risky. I’m terrified of losing him, too. I don't intend to admit my feelings anytime soon. The fear of losing yet another close friend outweighs everything else. Still, I'm struggling to figure out how to handle this situation. Oddly enough, despite everything my ex put me through, a part of me still holds onto love for him—the connection was so deep, and he was my first love. When I like Phil, I feel guilty, even though I know it’s not wrong. I also question whether Phil likes me back; there's chemistry sometimes, but I'm hesitant to let myself feel it fully. I've started to distance myself from Phil, though I worry that might hurt him. What should I do?

"27-year-old female, 35-year-old male: I'm feeling really disrespected by my partner."

**27/F & 35/M** We welcomed our second baby in July, and I've been focusing on my weight. Despite my friends and family assuring me that I'm making progress, I still feel uncomfortable in my own skin and struggle with self-consciousness. Today, my spouse and I had a small disagreement. I asked for some help around the house, but I might have come across the wrong way. He is really into gaming and spends his mornings playing until lunch, takes a break for a few hours, and then continues gaming after dinner. It feels overwhelming! I gently asked if he could lend a hand instead of being glued to his gaming console. He agreed but told me to hold on for a minute. Earlier this morning, I was on the computer looking up weight loss recipes when he snapped, "What about you, fatass? You were on the computer this morning!" I was furious and wanted to unleash my frustration on him, but I would never do that in front of our kids. It really hurts to hear him say things like that, especially when I'm working so hard to lose weight. Then, after realizing I was upset, he tried to play it off by saying he was just kidding. 😡

How can I (38F) find a compromise with my boyfriend (34M) regarding playing with my hair?

How can I (38F) reach a compromise with my boyfriend (34M) about his hair-twirling? My boyfriend (34M) and I (38F) have been together for three years, both bringing three kids from previous relationships, and we live apart. From the start of our relationship, he has enjoyed playing with my hair, which I initially found special and intimate. However, over time, I’ve noticed that he twirls the hair of everyone around him—his kids, my kids, and even the children of close friends. This has diminished the intimacy of his actions for me, to the point where I feel turned off when he twirls my hair, especially during moments of closeness like cuddling on the couch or when I’m giving him oral pleasure. I’ve expressed to him several times that I would prefer him to touch my body or scalp in a way that feels more like an appreciation of me, rather than just my hair. He argues that he can’t help it because it’s intimate for him, comparing it to how I might rub his back, which I believe is a more conscious and intentional act than simply twirling hair absentmindedly. This difference in perspective has led to interruptions during intimate moments and has sparked disagreements between us. I’m at a crossroads about whether I should begin to view my hair as an extension of my body, or if he should refrain from twirling my hair during those intimate occasions. On a related note that might be influencing my perception: about a year ago, a neighboring mother confronted us, saying he should stop touching her daughter’s hair because that’s how she was groomed, which eventually led to her sexual assault as a child.

I believe my girlfriend has left me because of hormonal changes.

Subject: Heartbroken Over Sudden Changes in My Relationship Hi, I'm reaching out because my girlfriend recently broke up with me and asked me to move out after discovering she was pregnant. I’m 27, and she’s 25. We've always shared a close bond and enjoyed a good relationship, despite the typical ups and downs that come with stressful times at work. However, in the last couple of months, my work situation has become challenging. I've been paired with an alcoholic colleague who makes everything more difficult, leaving me to handle most of the work on my own. His behavior has been pushing me to drink again, which I had issues with in the past. I’m stuck in endless conversations with him that are driving me crazy while balancing all the driving and paperwork. Despite all this, I’ve made an effort to be a good partner. However, my girlfriend’s attitude towards me changed dramatically out of nowhere. She stopped being affectionate, distanced herself emotionally, and began making manipulative comments. For example, when I quietly whispered to her at night, she insisted I was shouting. This has been the pattern for about two months. Then a few days ago, she called me at work in tears, revealing she was pregnant. When I got home, she was missing. Later, I found out she had gone to the cinema, which upset me. I waited for her to return, and when I finally checked on her around 11:30 PM, she was asleep on the couch. I took care of her by bringing her water, removing her makeup, and getting her pajamas ready. However, once again, she accused me of shouting while I was merely whispering. Frustrated and overwhelmed, I snapped and ended up punching the fridge. I know it was wrong, but after working tirelessly for 54 days straight and dealing with my girlfriend's harsh words, my emotions came to a head. Now, she has left me, and it's been hard to process her mood swings—one moment she seems fine and engaging, then suddenly switches to being distant and unkind. I can’t help but wonder if she might realize that her behavior was influenced by hormonal changes once the pregnancy ends and hope she will want to reconcile. I feel completely heartbroken, having lost my girlfriend, our dogs, our home, and the baby we might have had together. Our relationship was strong until she found out she was pregnant (she’s about eight weeks along), and since then, things took a downward turn. I'm devastated, struggling to eat, sleep, and coping with dark thoughts. I miss her deeply and want to know what I can do to address this situation. Thank you for any advice or insights you might have.

"My boyfriend believes that therapy will help him change."

He’s a 25-year-old man who has a lot to work on, and as a 21-year-old woman, I’ve been encouraging him to seek therapy. He often insists that the patterns he struggles with are an inherent part of who he is, and he fears that therapy might change him. However, his triggers keep coming up during our arguments, and I don’t want to take on the role of a therapist in our relationship. Does this mean I’m more in love with his potential than with him? (He believes that’s the case.) I’d appreciate some different perspectives on this situation.

'Long-Distance Relationship Without Communication'

I'm currently facing a challenging situation. I've been in an online relationship for the past 1.5 years with someone I truly care about ('20F' and '24M). We've connected through video calls and chats but haven’t met in person yet. He just got a job as a police officer and starts his training tomorrow. Unfortunately, phones aren’t permitted at the training camp, which means we won't be able to communicate during that time. We were planning to meet this Christmas, but those plans have changed. He’s starting his training tomorrow, and I’m feeling really anxious about how I’ll cope with the next year. I would appreciate any advice or support.

"Is one month too soon for this pace in a relationship?"

Is it too soon to spend the night at your significant other’s place after just a month of dating? And sharing a bed as well? What do you think?

"Exploring Situationships: Navigating the Gray Zone of Contemporary Dating"

Situationships – that ambiguous territory between a full-fledged relationship and something casual that many of us seem to fall into at some point. They can be messy and perplexing, often leaving us questioning our own choices and intentions. Recently, it appears that situationships have become the norm in the dating landscape. Perhaps it’s driven by a fear of commitment, a desire to keep options open, or simply a breakdown in communication. But let’s face it: it’s not always enjoyable. You might find yourself asking: Are we exclusive? Do they genuinely care about me, or am I just an option? Why can’t we just put a label on this? On one side, situationships can offer a relaxed and adaptable vibe. You’re just enjoying each other’s company, right? Yet, on the flip side, they can be exhausting, especially when one person desires more than what the other is ready to offer. So, let’s discuss: 1. Are situationships a natural outcome of today’s dating scene, or are they simply a result of poor communication? 2. Have you experienced a situationship? What was the outcome? 3. Any tips for moving from ambiguity to clarity? I’m eager to hear your insights!

"Developing feelings for someone while trying to move on from another?"

It's been a year since my four-year relationship ended, and every day has been a challenge. I still can’t believe how long it’s been. The breakup was profoundly painful, and not a day passes that I don’t think of him and the sadness he left me with. I've prayed countless times to move on and forget him, but it's proven difficult. In the midst of this, Phil, a high school friend, came back into my life. We had reconnected before the breakup, but after everything crumbled, he became my lifeline. We bonded over our shared experiences of heartbreak, among other things. He became my pillar of support when I didn’t feel I could rely on anyone else. The loss of mutual friends with my ex only made Phil's presence even more significant. As time went on, Phil and I grew incredibly close. With him, everything feels easy—comfortable and safe. We share so many laughs, and it’s been a long time since I’ve felt that kind of happiness. But now I find myself developing feelings for him, and it frightens me. Given my past, the thought of opening my heart to someone again, even someone as great as Phil, feels risky. I’m terrified of losing him too. I don’t plan to reveal my feelings. The fear of losing yet another best friend is overwhelming. But at the same time, I’m unsure how to handle this situation. Despite all the pain my ex caused me, a part of me still feels attached to him, and I have no idea if Phil feels the same way about me. I’ve started to distance myself from Phil out of worry. My thoughts are all over the place. What should I do?

"What should I buy my boyfriend for our first Christmas together?"

It's our first Christmas together, and he mentioned that he’s spent over £50 on me. I’d like to match that amount for him, aiming to neither overwhelm nor underwhelm him. I appreciate that he shares his interests and passions with me. However, he often buys himself what he wants, so I need to be cautious to avoid getting him something he might end up treating himself to instead. I’m looking for ideas that he hasn’t explicitly mentioned, so I have a broader selection to choose from. Thanks!

"Four months in, and there's still been no intimacy."

I'm a 25-year-old male, and my girlfriend, who is 20, and I have been together for four months in a committed relationship. Despite our connection, we have not yet had sex, and I find myself growing increasingly frustrated. I’m trying to be understanding, as she is a virgin and I have had multiple partners in the past. In my experience, even when I was 15, I was intimate with a girlfriend who was also a virgin, and it only took us about a week and a half of dating to take that step. Normally, I wouldn’t wait this long, but I genuinely like this girl and see a future with her, which is why I haven’t ended things. I’ve discussed my feelings with her, and she understands my frustrations. She has mentioned wanting to be more open-minded, yet there hasn’t been much change. I feel torn; I don’t want her to feel pressured, but I’m also frustrated by the continual rejection. We’ve had some sleepovers, but aside from light kissing, nothing advances further. She has expressed that she wants her first time to be with me but isn’t ready and isn’t sure when she will be. I plan to have a heart-to-heart with her about this tonight, as it hasn’t been addressed in a while. What are some suggestions for what I should say or ask during this conversation?

"Am I being dramatic?"

Last night, my boyfriend (28/M) and I (23/F) were just about to drift off to sleep when our neighbors started making a lot of noise during their intimate moments. When I heard her scream, I noticed my boyfriend was getting aroused. I didn’t say anything, and we ended up being intimate too because he was turned on. I get that it’s a natural response, and I should just move on, but honestly, it left me feeling uneasy and ashamed about my reaction. Any thoughts?

"There's a big conflict, and I'm unsure how to handle it."

I (17F) recently had a major fight with my boyfriend (17M) of one year, and it was pretty intense—definitely the most serious argument we've ever had. At one point, I even accused him of cheating because he's been spending time with a classmate I don’t particularly like. I can't quite put my finger on why she makes me feel jealous, but whenever I hear about their interactions, I lose it. I've never experienced jealousy like this before and I know I need to address it. Our argument lasted the entire weekend, from Friday to Sunday. He mentioned that he didn’t want to talk, and I respected his space, but as an overthinker, I couldn’t shake off the worry that he might want to end things. Eventually, I reached out to tell him I love him and I was sorry because I wasn’t sleeping anyway. He left my message unread in the morning, which only heightened my anxiety, so I messaged him again asking for a response. We finally had a conversation where I apologized, and it seemed like he forgave me. However, the atmosphere between us still feels tense and everything seems different now. This is my first relationship, and I'm worried things won’t go back to how they used to be. Is this a normal part of relationships? Are we going to be okay? I feel like crying and I’m not sure how to handle this. I don’t have much experience with relationships, and this situation just feels off to me.

I (21 M) feel terrible every time I discuss my emotions with my girlfriend (21 F).

I've been dating my girlfriend (21F) for the past two months, and I’m feeling really exhausted. From the start, we both agreed to be open and honest about our feelings. Initially, we faced some typical relationship challenges, but we worked through them together. I put in a lot of effort to make her happy. However, just one month in, she started getting upset over what I consider minor issues, shutting down communication, and disappearing. Here are a few examples: * I told her multiple times that I was tired and planned to go to bed early, but it still upset her. * While we were watching a movie, I went to grab some water and she sent me an Instagram video that I didn’t check out because I wanted to focus on the movie. * I spent time chatting with my friends. Last week, I finally shared my feelings about her behavior, explaining how her reactions made me feel awful, but I also reassured her that I was open to discussing things. Unsurprisingly, she didn’t take it well. Yet, the next morning, we talked as if nothing significant had happened. Today, she sent me a video saying, *"When I try to express my feelings and he responds with 'I hear you, baby,' instead of 'Why do you have to make a problem out of everything?'"* She added, *"Unfortunately, you made me feel like the second part."* It appears that I’m somehow at fault for not fully understanding her feelings. Sometimes she claims it’s merely *"her attitude,"* which I don't think is a valid excuse. Every time I try to express my feelings, I end up feeling like I'm doing something wrong or saying hurtful things to her. This situation is becoming overwhelming, and I don’t feel at peace in our relationship. I find myself overthinking every little action, which I really dislike, but I still love her. I’m not sure if this is just because it’s my first relationship, but I worry that if I choose to end things, I might come across as someone cruel who hurt someone just trying to be understood.

"21M, why am I still single?"

Hey everyone! I hope you’re all doing well. Lately, I’ve been reflecting on why I’m still single, and I could really use your insights. A little about me: I’m a 21-year-old guy, standing at 1.96m and weighing around 98kg. I’ve worked hard for my athletic build, and I like to think I have a decent level of intelligence. Plus, I have a great taste in music that seems to resonate with many people. On paper, I check a lot of boxes that people typically look for. Yet, I find myself navigating the dating scene alone, which makes me question whether it’s just a matter of timing, my dating approach, or something else entirely that I might be missing. I’d love to hear your perspectives. Has anyone else faced a similar situation? What do you think might be contributing to my single status? If you’re interested in offering some advice, feel free to check out my Instagram: @silvah.tv. I can’t wait to hear your stories and suggestions. Thanks for taking the time to read this!

How can I determine if my relationship is characterized by narcissism?

In my current long-distance relationship, there are certain behaviors from my partner that genuinely upset me. Although we've only been together for a short time, I've noticed that being direct and attempting to take charge of the situation often helps me communicate my feelings, though it frequently leads to arguments. There are multiple actions of his that leave me feeling hurt, including: - Ignoring me or ending our calls whenever something I say bothers him. - Telling me to "shut up" when I talk too much. While I realize he often means this as a joke, at times I can't tell his intention. - Guilt-tripping me by claiming he's a bad boyfriend whenever I'm upset, regardless of whether it's due to him or something else. - Misrepresenting my words or taking them out of context. - Disregarding my boundaries. - Becoming upset when I check in on him; his tone shifts noticeably before I ask, indicating he's already bothered. He then insists that he’s fine but gets angry with me, saying, “Do you not realize you’re the one making me upset right now?” - Getting easily angered over minor issues, often without me meaning to provoke him. These patterns have led me to question whether this could be a form of narcissistic abuse, and that's not even everything. I have no intention of leaving him as I'm not someone who gives up easily. He deserves love just like everyone else, and I can't bear the thought of him being alone for the rest of his life, especially since I care deeply for him. He brings me joy and is my best friend, but some of these issues seem insurmountable. I’m seeking answers and a clearer understanding of his perspective. A breakup isn’t something I’m considering right now because I know how to navigate my feelings, and if it becomes overwhelming, I’ll know when to walk away. Any advice on how to handle this situation would be truly appreciated.

I, a 31-year-old male, met a 28-year-old female online. We're from different states and have plans to meet in person.

Hello, this is my first time posting, so I appreciate your patience. I've been talking to a girl I met online from another state—she's 28 and very kind, but she tends to be quite emotional and cries over various things. We've been getting closer for about seven months, and I’m set to meet her in a couple of weeks. However, I’m feeling unsure about it. She has expressed a strong desire for me to move to her state and seems eager to accelerate our relationship into something more serious in under a year, which makes me a bit uneasy. Moving away from my home state would be a significant risk for me, as I would be leaving behind family, friends, and everything I've worked for. I’m torn between whether to end things before I meet her or to go ahead and meet her and see how I feel afterward. I don’t want to hurt her by leading her on, but I also don’t want to stay in a situation that makes me uncomfortable. Any advice would be greatly appreciated. Am I wrong for feeling this way?

"20F I recently lost my virginity to a 19M and have started being more active sexually, but it's still a bit awkward. Any tips on how we can improve?"

My boyfriend (19M) and I (20NB/F) recently lost our virginity to each other, and it was genuinely enjoyable! Initially, I thought everything would be straightforward, but when we started, lining up our bodies was a challenge, and things didn’t always go or stay where we expected. We were surprised by some unexpected sounds and even ended up slipping off the bed— it was actually pretty funny, and we shared a lot of laughs. During foreplay, he’s very enthusiastic about making sure I’m satisfied and is open to suggestions! However, he sometimes gets a bit too eager while going down on me— he can be a little rough, especially when he’s stimulating my clitoris, which can go from pleasurable to overly sensitive very quickly. He’s also been a bit intense when we kiss, but with some guidance, he’s been getting softer during those moments, which is encouraging. On our first encounter, things progressed so rapidly that my immediate reaction was to fake an orgasm to redirect him, which I know sounds bad. I left feeling a little upset that it had to end in that way, and I felt guilty for not expressing my feelings in the moment. So, the next time we were getting intimate, I suggested we show each other how we usually prefer to be touched. I guided him to be gentler with his hands and explained how I like to be touched. When he tried going down on me again, I was nervous about how things might escalate too quickly, so I had to keep guiding his head away. Additionally, since we were in a cold AC room, I found myself drying up from the chill, which made things even more challenging. How can we navigate this without losing the moment? Also, while I think my boyfriend is well-endowed lengthwise, I tend to respond better to girth. Are there particular positions that would highlight his girth more effectively while we’re in motion? We enjoyed the lazy doggy style position when we tried it, as it felt incredibly intense. Furthermore, I’ve found that practicing riding positions on my own is much easier than doing so on a small bed with another person involved. Even though I'm quite flexible, it can be surprising to find the right rhythm and balance. Do you have any tips for building my endurance and stamina for those positions? Any insights into managing the various factors I’ve mentioned would be greatly appreciated. Overall, my boyfriend has expressed some insecurity about his ability to please me, and I find myself torn between not wanting him to feel inadequate as we both learn together and understanding that I need to assert what I need to ensure a positive experience. I don’t want to enable any bad habits that might become harder to address later on. I’m here seeking any advice, suggestions, or guidance you all can provide. Edit: I realize that if I’m asking for advice on communication and the response is simply “communicate,” it kind of feels like we’re going in circles, doesn’t it? LOL.

Am I taking up his time unnecessarily?

I’m looking for an unbiased opinion. So, I'm a 20-year-old female and he’s a 21-year-old male; we’ve been high school friends. We spent the first two years of our relationship together, but the last two years have been more on and off. Now, things are getting serious again, and we’ve talked about intimacy. He often asks when we will take that step, but I’m not ready for it. Just to clarify, I haven't had any sexual experience, and I don’t have any trauma; it’s just where I am right now. I’m hesitant to share this with him because I really value our relationship and I’m afraid of losing him. He’s a wonderful person, but I worry that he might want more than I can give.

I just discovered that my mother-in-law (55f) is irritated that I always arrive with something in hand.

I was always taught that it’s impolite to arrive without something in hand, so I’ve consistently brought treats like cupcakes, brownies, or cookies to events at my in-laws. I never went overboard—just enough to express my gratitude and respect. During our last visit, I asked what I should bring for Thanksgiving, and she said, “You’re in charge of wine. No need for anything else—just one.” We have a wonderful relationship, and I never sensed that she was bothered by my contributions in the past. However, I still felt uneasy about this new directive, as I was raised to believe it’s discourteous to show up empty-handed. I checked in with my husband, asking, “Are you sure one bottle of wine is enough? Should I make another dessert? Is there something else she might need help with? It feels a bit rude to only bring one wine for the whole family.” His reply was, “She only gave you the wine task because she knows that if she didn’t, you’d probably overdo it. She doesn’t even need the wine; it’s just to make you feel involved. She told me not to mention this to you.” (For context, my husband is autistic, so while his delivery can come across as blunt, he means no offense.) I’ll follow her request and bring just one bottle of wine, and perhaps I’ll learn that it’s okay to arrive empty-handed, even if that feels a bit unsettling. Am I overstepping by wanting to contribute, or is it common in American culture to show up without something for gatherings?

Tips for relationships

I'm in need of some guidance. My boyfriend (23) and I (24) have been together for just 10 months, and I experienced a whirlwind romance that led us to move in together. However, I think I might have rushed that decision. After moving in, I've come to realize that we have significant differences regarding crucial topics like career aspirations, family values, politics, and even our levels of maturity and public behavior. I’m not sure how I missed these red flags earlier—perhaps I was simply blinded by love. Now that I'm aware of these discrepancies, I find myself questioning our relationship more than ever. What once seemed minor now feels frustrating to me, and I’m surprised by how much annoyance I’ve started to feel. Initially, I thought my lack of libido was due to hormonal issues, but I've realized that it's not about a lack of desire for intimacy—it's more about my lack of desire for intimacy with him. When I try to discuss these concerns, he tends to downplay them. For instance, when he made a borderline racist joke in a store, I felt uncomfortable and embarrassed, telling him it wasn't appropriate. His response was that it wasn't a big deal since the person he was joking about didn’t hear. That’s really not the point for me. Here's the thing: he treats me incredibly well and makes me feel special in ways I can’t complain about. Despite his immature humor and sometimes questionable behavior, he is fundamentally a kind person. The idea of hurting him makes me truly sad. What should I do? Since we just moved in together, I know we could break the lease if necessary. Is it too soon to consider couples counseling? How do I express that I feel a lack of attraction to him and that he has room to grow, without coming across as trying to change him? I really don’t want to be the “bad guy,” but I also feel like my love for him is fading, and I feel terrible about it. Any advice would be greatly appreciated.

I've been dating this guy (40m) for a month, but he always chooses date locations just 5-10 minutes from his place. Then, he lies and says it takes him twice or three times that long to get there. What should I do?

I've been dating a guy for a month now, and he lives in a different city, about 30 minutes away from me—sometimes a bit longer. He did share his general area, but I managed to find out his exact location. I've noticed that every time he plans our dates, they are always set just 5 to 10 minutes from his place, which ends up taking me 30 to 40 minutes to get there. Although he pays for all our outings (even though I’ve offered to split), what bothers me is that he often claims he’s trying to find a location that’s convenient for both of us. He also exaggerates how long it takes him to get there, saying it takes him double or even triple the time, when in fact, the places are just around the corner from him. I've tried suggesting dates that are further away, but he always suggests meeting closer to him instead or complains about parking. He has come to my city once, which was nice, and he brought me food once after I canceled a date because I was tired. I did feel a bit turned off by how he handles our date planning, especially when he lies about travel times. He even mentioned he was worried I would stop seeing him because I canceled. I'm confused about his intentions. If our relationship gets more serious and he invites me over, I’ll eventually uncover the truth. Since I have a general idea of where he lives, I wonder if he's truly serious about me. I feel awkward bringing it up since he seems unaware that I know his location. In brief: I've been dating this guy (40) for a month, and he consistently chooses places just a short distance from his home while telling me it takes significantly longer to reach them.

As an 18-year-old woman, I can't shake the feeling that my boyfriend, who's 19, still loves his ex more than me. Am I just overthinking this, or is there something more going on?

We began to get to know each other while he was still in an on-and-off relationship with his ex-girlfriend. At that time, we were just friends with no romantic intentions. After they broke up for a while, we started spending more time together and officially became a couple four months later. Initially, everything felt great, but soon I realized that things weren't quite what I had anticipated. We used to have so much fun together, but once we entered a relationship, we began to notice each other's flaws and became more considerate of one another. One day, while going through his playlists, I stumbled upon a newly created one that included a description expressing his feelings of missing his ex and asking for a second chance. When I brought this up to him, he explained that it was just a moment of stress and admitted it was foolish. I chose to overlook it, and we continued dating. As time passed, I began to notice that his expression of love for me was quite different—not in a positive way—compared to how he treated his ex. In my opinion, the best way to request something is to treat people as you wish to be treated, without appearing needy. I shared my feelings on social media, wrote him heartfelt messages, and even made playlists for him, but he didn’t reciprocate in the same way. He hadn’t even completed the gift for our anniversary or saved the playlist I created. He had done those things for his ex, but not for me, and it's difficult to bring this up with a partner. His ex also mentioned that he wrote her emails during our situationship, but he claimed they were generic messages meant to spare my feelings, and I chose to trust him and continue our relationship. Despite having numerous arguments in just three months, we still managed to work through them. However, I later discovered that he had been texting his ex, saying he wouldn’t leave her alone, but I kept that information to myself. Throughout our relationship, he has sometimes hurt me, but I tend to blame myself for taking his jokes too seriously or for being unaware in certain situations, despite trying my best to make him feel seen and loved. I often find myself thinking about his ex, reflecting on our love, and wondering if I'm somehow at fault for his behavior. We're only a few months into the relationship, and already there are problems, which leads me to worry a lot. I love him and don’t want this to become a long-term issue. Is there anything I can do to improve our situation?

Here are a few alternative ways to express the concept of "marriage": 1. Matrimony 2. Wedding union 3. Nuptials 4. Spousal relationship 5. Marital bond Let me know if you need something specific!

I'm a 21-year-old woman married to my 22-year-old husband, who is in the military. We relocated to a different country when I was 19 and he was 21. To give you some background, I was raised to be very independent and I value self-sufficiency. I wasn’t thrilled about his decision to join the military, but ultimately, it was his choice. I left behind my family, friends, car, and career to support his goals, and now I often feel lost, like I’m just following him around. We've been in this new country for over a year, and the transition has been tough. Initially, I would cry multiple times a day, then once a day, then weekly, and so on. I never wanted this for myself, but I recognize that I am responsible for my current situation. There have been some things my husband has done that I can’t seem to shake off. They may not be extreme, but they weigh on my mind: - When we first arrived, we both agreed to quit vaping, and we had heartfelt conversations about how much better we felt. However, I later found out he had been lying and was still smoking. - During a heated argument, he shoved me hard out of the bedroom while I was standing in the doorway, which was alarming. - Just a few days ago, he was having a tough day at work and got rough with me, putting me in a headlock. It wasn’t excessively tight, but it startled me. - When I express feelings of loneliness about being in this new place, missing friends, or sacrificing my previous life for his career, he dismisses my concerns as having a “woe is me” mentality and shuts down the conversation. I feel completely isolated here; he’s the only person I talk to. Sometimes I just need to share how I’m feeling. Another issue is that I have to essentially beg for dates. This month, we haven’t gone out at all. I had planned for every Wednesday to be date night, but something always comes up—he’s sick, tired from work, or doesn’t mention it at all. I feel conflicted because, despite these issues, he is a good person. I never doubt his loyalty, and he’s open about sharing his passwords and keeping his phone accessible. He surprises me with small gifts from the store and remembers what I like. However, he often tells me that I don’t appreciate him enough. When I ask for specifics, he mentions small tasks like walking the dog on the weekend or picking up after himself. But I feel like I handle most of the household responsibilities—cleaning up after him, taking care of our dog, and cooking multiple meals each day to accommodate our different diets. It’s disheartening that I don’t get to go out or receive appreciation in return. Honestly, I’m uncertain about where my marriage stands. I’m only 21, and I’m struggling to understand my feelings about our relationship. Any advice would be appreciated.

22 male and 23 female

22M Hey, I've been dating my girlfriend, who’s 23, for about six months. A week ago, she invited me to a Friendsgiving event. I haven’t seen her much lately because she’s been busy with family. The plan is for everyone to hang out and then go out for drinks afterward. I work full-time, and I'm not really into drinking. Yesterday, I checked in with her to see if she still wanted me to come, and she mentioned that she doesn’t know many people there and that everyone will be drinking. Am I overthinking this? I can’t shake the feeling that she might not actually want me to be there, but when I asked her, she promised that wasn’t the case.

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