Relationship advices: Dating and Starting Relationships

Dating and Starting Relationships • 15h ago

How crucial is it for you to fit your partner's "type"?

A few months ago, I (40/F) connected with someone on a dating app, and we hit it off almost instantly from our very first message. We’ve grown quite close and developed strong feelings for each other. They’ve been an excellent communicator and listener, showing affection and attentiveness, and our conversations are filled with laughter and depth. Recently, we decided to make our relationship official. They’ve even told me on several occasions that they believe I’m their “Forever Person.” The physical chemistry seemed perfect, or so I thought. However, during a casual chat about attraction (I can’t recall the exact topic), I asked what initially drew them to my profile—specifically, whether they were physically attracted to me right away or if that developed with their feelings. I’m not sure why I asked, as I felt confident we were both attracted to each other. The response surprised me; they mentioned they sometimes like to go for something different than their usual type. When I sought clarification, they described what their typical attraction is, which sounded almost completely different from me, except for a few traits. I asked why they chose to be in a relationship with me if I’m not their usual type, and they said it was because of our vibe and conversations, and they didn’t want to lose that connection. This left me feeling that while they care for me, they might not be physically attracted to me. To be fair, they have called me pretty, but it left me wondering. They insisted that’s not what they meant, but I was too hurt to pursue the discussion any further at that moment. Now, I’m feeling apprehensive about where this relationship is heading. I’m contemplating taking a step back because I’m uncertain how comfortable I’ll be knowing I’m not their typical type. While I consider myself attractive, I’ve never worried about whether the person I’m dating finds me appealing. Is it worthwhile to continue this otherwise enjoyable relationship, or should I focus on the emotional connection, vibe, and bond we share? I’m genuinely torn and could use some advice.


Dating and Starting Relationships • 19h ago

I'm not in a relationship, so why hasn't he asked me out?

I met this guy on Tinder, and after we exchanged Instagram accounts, we've been chatting for less than a month. He has suggested going out a few times, but something always comes up. He was the one who brought it up first; initially, his parents were visiting, then he had exams. Once he finished his exams, he wanted to know if I was free to meet up, and I said I was somewhat available. He mentioned he might go to his hometown for a family event but didn’t follow up to check when I was available. Today, I decided to ask him if he was free tomorrow, and he told me he's heading to his hometown. I wished him a pleasant trip, but I’m left wondering if this is just a case of bad timing or something else. He was really engaging and chatty at the beginning, but his communication has decreased since his exams. How should I interpret this situation? Is he genuinely busy, or is there something more going on?


Dating and Starting Relationships • 2d ago

Unexpectedly Discovered a Stunning Woman While Networking on LinkedIn

I was networking on LinkedIn and came across a beautiful girl who is a student at my university and works at a consulting firm I'm interested in. I discovered that she has a boyfriend (no need to judge), and I'm curious about the best way to get to know her and see if she's open to new possibilities in her personal life. Would a coffee chat for "networking" be a good idea, or are there better strategies? I want to keep it subtle, especially since she’s in a relationship (although her boyfriend seems a bit dull). Do you have any suggestions?


Dating and Starting Relationships • 2d ago

Am I overthinking, being childish, or is she simply occupied?

M20 F22 I met this girl three days ago, and everything was going well. However, things have since changed; she doesn't respond as promptly as she used to. I asked her if she wanted to grab milkshakes with me this evening, but all day I’ve been left on delivered. She responded by suggesting tomorrow instead. It just feels different since she typically replies quickly, and today that hasn’t been the case.


Dating and Starting Relationships • 2d ago

I'm 18 and I'm unsure if my relationship with my classmate, who is also 18, is purely platonic or if she’s interested in something more.

I'm an 18-year-old male, and I'm feeling a bit confused about my relationship with a female classmate who is 18. We often have nice conversations, but recently she's been asking me if I plan to attend the upcoming school dance. While she’s going with some friends, she also inquired about who I might want to go with, and since I don’t have many female friends (being more introverted), I didn’t have an answer. She even suggested that I could invite her to the dance. I’m not great at reading between the lines, so I’m uncertain whether she’s being friendly or if she’s hinting at wanting to go together as a couple.


Dating and Starting Relationships • 3d ago

I'm an 18-year-old male, and I've been reflecting on my relationship with my girlfriend, who is also 18.

We've been dating for nearly a year, and things are going well between us. However, I can't shake the feeling that I might not be ready to commit to a serious relationship. I worry that it could end badly for us. I truly love her and never want to hurt her. She's an incredible person, and her belief that we'll get married soon makes me anxious; I can't help but think about the possibility of causing her pain. I genuinely feel like I'm the source of her happiness, especially since we share so much about our lives. I really don't want to break up with her, but I'm uncertain about what to do. Am I wrong for having these thoughts?


Dating and Starting Relationships • 3d ago

I have a crush on my manager… (office edition)

A tale as old as time… I (32F) found myself captivated by my manager (36M). This realization crept in slowly—almost a year into our working relationship, I began to see him in a new light. I’ve always thought he was attractive; his charming smile and captivating eyes drew me in. Not to mention, he’s intelligent, positive, and kind, exuding a distinctly masculine energy. Before I knew it, I was smitten. Initially, I believed this infatuation would be fleeting, but it’s been four months now, and if anything, my feelings have only intensified. I genuinely want what’s best for him and would never want to disrupt our professional lives or our working dynamic. I’m determined to handle this situation thoughtfully, to the extent that I'm even considering switching teams or, in the worst-case scenario, finding a job elsewhere. These feelings have been weighing heavily on me; I feel drained. My sleep has suffered since this started, and I’ve lost my appetite. Lately, I’ve been getting the impression that he might feel the same way, but I’m left puzzled—could I be misinterpreting his actions? Am I simply blinded by my own feelings, or is there something real brewing beneath the surface? I could use some guidance! Here are some signs I’ve noticed: 1. He genuinely seems to care about when I’m doing well, often asking about my well-being and how my weekend went. 2. When he approaches my workspace, he tends to stand just a bit closer than necessary, though I don't move away—it feels nice to have him near. He often leans in while we talk, too. 3. Occasionally, when he asks me to pass him something, our hands or arms brush against each other. While these could be accidental, it’s happened a few times. 4. In group settings, he always positions his feet toward me, even if it means tweaking his posture—regardless of whether he’s facing me directly. 5. He laughs at even my worst jokes and has a big smile whenever he’s around me. 6. Our eye contact feels particularly intense, as if we share a profound connection. Sometimes when he talks to me and makes eye contact, I completely zone out, relying on automatic responses like “Mhm” and “Yes.” 7. Some colleagues have picked up on this dynamic—though I’m not sure if they’re sensing something from me or him. One time, while he was laughing in our work chat, a coworker kept turning to look at me, seemingly trying to gauge my reaction. I just feigned boredom and avoided using my keyboard. It felt as if she was trying to catch something unspoken. We strictly communicate about work via chat, email, or text, but our personal conversations are reserved for face-to-face interactions, especially during one-on-one meetings. 8. I often catch him stealing glances in my direction. 9. Occasionally, he blushes or seems nervous around me, but I can’t tell if it’s due to me or if he’s generally a nervous person. 10. He sometimes stumbles over his words or appears distracted during our conversations. Deep down, despite my infatuation clouding my judgment, I can’t ignore the signs that suggest something might be happening. There has to be more than just my imagination… right?


Dating and Starting Relationships • 3d ago

How can I tell if I love my 19-year-old girlfriend if I’ve never really understood what love is?

My girlfriend and I are both 19 years old and have been together for just over a year since we met in college. When we first started dating, I had a nice group of friends and life felt pretty normal. But once I met her, everything changed. The way we connected, the way we gazed into each other's eyes, and how we would linger on campus long after classes had ended just to be together were all special moments. We spent countless hours together, and for the most part, it was wonderful. I won’t pretend that I was perfect; I realize now that during arguments, I often prioritized my own feelings over hers. I noticed some changes in her demeanor and understood that I needed to adjust how I reacted to things. Over the last two or three weeks, she has been incredibly busy with work, and we haven’t had much time to talk. My mind started racing with thoughts, making me worry that she might be growing tired of me. This led to constant stomach pain and anxiety for a while. However, everything changed when she came over one day and reassured me while I cried in her arms. Now that I feel secure in her love, I find myself questioning my own feelings for her. I don’t understand why this is happening. I was devastated and anxious, thinking she might not love me, and that worry kept me from eating for days. But now, with that fear alleviated, I'm left wondering if I truly love her. It feels confusing, and I’m not sure if what I feel qualifies as love. She makes me happy—when I'm with her, I feel at home and relaxed. I adore her sparkling eyes and the way her touch feels. I’ve opened up to her completely, and it doesn’t bother me at all; I appreciate her vulnerability as well. She puts in so much effort for our relationship, and I genuinely can’t imagine my life without her. I've even turned to my faith, wanting to fight for our love and explore new possibilities together. But now I’m starting to fear that this might not be meant to be. I definitely don’t want to lead her on; I want her happiness above all. I’m happy with her, but I also can’t stop thinking about our future together, which I envision positively. Honestly, I think it might just be my overthinking—this is my first real relationship. She has met my family, who adore her, and I’ve met hers, who love me in return. I really need advice on what to do. Please help!


Dating and Starting Relationships • 4d ago

Assistance required

How can I communicate to the guy I'm currently talking to that I'm not interested in being intimate because I don't find him physically attractive? I don't want to come off as harsh or negative; he's a great person, but I'm just not physically drawn to him.


Dating and Starting Relationships • 4d ago

I (18F) asked him (18M) out 😰

I posted yesterday asking for advice on whether I should ask my crush out, and I got some encouragement to go for it. So, I took the plunge 😰 I asked him if he was going to our high school play, and he said he was planning to go alone. I mentioned that all my friends are going with their dates, and I really didn't want to be a third wheel, so I asked if I could join him. He looked at me awkwardly and said, "Hmm... interesting." There was a pretty thick awkward silence before he finally said we could go together. I said thanks and then walked away feeling a bit deflated 😭 After that, we didn’t talk for the rest of class, which is unusual for us. Now I'm left wondering if I made a mistake and if he really doesn't like me or if he was just caught off guard. I hope my approach gave him a chance to back out if he wanted, but I'm not sure 😭 Should I reach out to him or just leave things as they are? ————- TL;DR: Did asking him to the play mess up our friendship?


Dating and Starting Relationships • 4d ago

Is he still interested or not? What would you all do? ❤️

Hey, everyone! I hope you’re all doing well ❤️ I’m really sorry for this long message, so I’ll try to keep it brief. I started seeing someone in the summer of 2023, and we hit it off, messaging each other occasionally throughout 2024, before meeting again that summer. As we spent more time together, it felt like we were building a real connection, and they expressed feeling the same way. However, by winter 2024, I noticed our conversations had dwindled. When I asked if they were still interested, they confirmed they were. But after a few days of silence where I was left on read, I reached out. They had their reasons for the lack of communication, and I understood; I told them it was okay if they no longer wanted to continue. But the gap in our conversations persisted, which led me to overthink and feel anxious. In the heat of the moment, I ended things, which I now realize was a huge mistake. I apologized and gave them space, unaware they were on holiday at the time. Now, we’ve discussed the situation, and they mentioned that I was overthinking, which hurt them. Although I respect their need for space, I can’t shake the feeling that they might not be interested anymore. I’ve shared my thoughts and feelings with them, but I haven’t received a clear answer. I’m trying to give them space while also considering whether to hold onto hope (my anxiety is slowly easing) or accept that they might have lost interest (I still really like them). Am I overthinking this? Do you think they’ve lost interest? What would you do in my shoes? Thank you all! ❤️


Dating and Starting Relationships • 4d ago

I would really appreciate your guidance, as I could use some advice at this stage in my life.

I'm feeling a bit lost regarding a relationship situation, and I could really use some advice. Here’s the story: back in December 2022, at a classmate's birthday party, my best friend and I met his older sister, who is two years my senior. I remember thinking she was stunning and possibly the most amazing girl I’ve ever encountered. I developed a bit of a crush on her, though it didn't feel intense enough to be love at the time. We played tag and had a great time, and afterward, my best friend shared her Discord with me, which led to a group chat that eventually became direct messages. Fast forward to the following year, I'm now at her school with my friend group. The school divides grades for lunch, so we only see each other for about an hour each day, but that little time still makes me happy. Over months, my crush deepened, and I fell in love with her. My social media feed became filled with thoughts of her, and I almost mustered the courage to confess my feelings daily. However, I felt self-conscious—at 5'1" and with an awkward hairstyle, I knew she looked far more put together. Finally, I decided to tell her how I felt. While in my gaming setup, I had a little chat with her on Discord, then revealed my feelings. She kindly said she didn't feel the same way but wanted to remain friends. I was so embarrassed that I suggested we shouldn’t talk anymore. Ironically, we had to sit next to each other in class, making things exceedingly awkward. I avoided eye contact and didn't speak to her for the rest of the year. Now, two years later, we’ve started talking again, but not in the way you might expect. She transferred to another school, and most of our conversations now turn into long-winded arguments on Discord, often about her little brother’s disdain for me. Interestingly, my best friend—her brother—has also distanced himself from me for reasons I still don’t fully understand. As my last year at my school approached and I prepared to join her at her new school, our friendship improved, and we began chatting a lot on Instagram. During winter break, out of the blue, she confessed that she liked me. I was overjoyed, especially because I had just found faith in Christ, which felt like a beautiful gift. This was one of the happiest moments of my life since I was still deeply in love with her. However, after we returned to school, our communication waned, and I found myself waiting for her to message me first. Unfortunately, that rarely happened. A month after winter break, I made a regrettable joke about her little brother, which led her to block me. She has a history of blocking me over trivial things, often alternating between blocking and unblocking over the span of weeks or months. Despite our Instagram fallout, she didn’t block me on Discord. For two days, I messaged her every 30 minutes, but she mostly ignored me until she eventually replied that her notifications were off. While I found that amusing—calling her on Discord rang through—I felt she was being particularly unresponsive. She did unblock me on Instagram, but when I tried sending her a bunch of reels, she just left me on read, which left me feeling really down. When she blocked me again shortly after I sent her a reel on my way home, I started to suspect her little brother might be influencing her decisions. Now, she hasn't unblocked me or responded to my messages on Discord, and I’m unsure what to do next. I’d appreciate any advice from you all. Thank you, and God bless you! Edit: Just to clarify, we won’t be able to date until I join her school, and her family is not fond of me due to her little brother’s negative comments.


Dating and Starting Relationships • 5d ago

Hey everyone, I could really use some advice! 😩

Last year, I was dating a wonderful man. We had an incredible first and second date, and after our second outing, we spent the night together (nothing intimate happened). I shared some thoughts that I believe might have overwhelmed him. He later mentioned that I came on too strong, which might have scared him off. Since then, we hadn't really communicated for about four months. At my friend's birthday party, I reached out to him, but I reacted poorly when he didn't want to drive over an hour and a half to pick me up. In a moment of frustration and under the influence of alcohol, I said I would find someone else to meet me, and that ended our conversation. Now, I’ve been working on some past trauma in therapy and was encouraged to apologize to those I may have hurt. I reached out to him, expressing my regrets and thanking him for being honest instead of ghosting me. He responded kindly, just like he did before. He congratulated me on my personal growth and made me smile, which was a nice surprise. It's been three days since that exchange, and I can’t stop thinking about him. I'm unsure how to proceed. I want to avoid coming on too strong again, but I genuinely like him. When we spoke initially, he mentioned wanting to take things slow and see where they led, and I would love a second chance to pursue that. However, I'm unsure of the best approach now. How can I reconnect with him without being overwhelming? What steps can I take to rekindle our connection?


Dating and Starting Relationships • 6d ago

What should I do? I would appreciate your help.

I'm a 23-year-old woman, and I've been in a relationship with my boyfriend, who is 26, for the past two years. Recently, a school friend of mine, who is 24 and lives overseas, called me while drunk and confessed that he has feelings for me. We've known each other for about ten years, and he was aware of my relationship, expressing regret for not confessing sooner and apologizing for his behavior. I shared everything with my boyfriend, who took it calmly and was understanding, emphasizing that my choices are what truly matters. My friend later texted to say he doesn't remember much of the conversation because he was so intoxicated. I haven't mentioned his confession to him yet. I genuinely enjoy the platonic friendship I have with this school friend and appreciate our occasional conversations. I would appreciate any advice on how to handle this situation. Thank you in advance!


Dating and Starting Relationships • 6d ago

19F, is it alright if I try to find my boyfriend, 20M, who suddenly disappeared after two months?

My boyfriend and I met in college, where I was a senior and he was a junior. I first noticed him at an event and developed a crush. After finding out his name, I ended up looking him up on social media. Despite being quite popular and having many followers, I took the plunge and texted him first. I'm generally shy and introverted, but we instantly clicked and quickly realized we had strong feelings for each other. We decided to start a relationship and went on several dates. Recently, however, he has become distant. He drinks and smokes, and one night while he was drunk, he broke down and revealed that he has a serious illness related to his addictions. It was a shock to see him show such vulnerability, as he’s usually quite reserved. When I pressed him for details, he was reluctant to share but did mention he was going to see a doctor the following day. When I asked him what the doctor said, he claimed everything was fine. Ever since that conversation, he has seemingly vanished. I’ve tried reaching out through calls, texts, and emails, but he hasn’t responded and is not even active on social media. He hasn’t blocked me, but it's as if he has just disappeared. This is puzzling, especially since he used to be very clingy and would struggle to go a day without talking to me. Now I’m left wondering if I should reach out to his friends to check on him. They don’t know me well; some are familiar, but most aren’t. Do you think he’s trying to distance himself from me? Should I make more effort to get in touch with him?


Dating and Starting Relationships • 6d ago

Locating her!

I was in a relationship for about 5-6 years, but now she's engaged, and I've been single for the past year. Over the last few months, I've been concentrating on my studies, but lately, I've been craving someone to talk to. I'm not interested in anything casual; I just want someone who can listen and offer a fresh perspective on my thoughts. I've met a few people recently, both through Instagram and coaching, but they seem to be very outgoing and focused on material things like flashy cars and trendy cafes. I come from an affluent background in a small town, but that lifestyle doesn’t appeal to me. What I truly seek is someone who is calm, down-to-earth, and genuine—someone with whom I can have meaningful conversations and who understands me, just as I would strive to understand them. Does anyone else share these feelings?


Dating and Starting Relationships • 6d ago

Why am I feeling lovesick? Male, 33; Female, 24.

I've recently started getting to know this amazing girl, and we have developed strong feelings for each other and even said "I love you." However, I'm feeling some strange symptoms of lovesickness or anxiety that I can't quite grasp. I find myself longing for her, thinking about her constantly, and experiencing a lack of appetite, nausea, and trouble sleeping. It might sound obsessive, but I can't control it. This whole experience is new, and I should be feeling excited and reassured knowing she loves me, yet instead, I feel a sense of worry and anxiety.


Dating and Starting Relationships • 7d ago

What caused my unblocking?

I haven't talked to this guy in six months, and he unexpectedly texted me after unblocking me. I read the message but didn’t respond. What could this mean?


Dating and Starting Relationships • 7d ago

I’m feeling really confused and could use some help.

Hey everyone, I’m a 21-year-old female, and I’ve been feeling really down lately. Last year, I connected with a guy on a dating app, and after chatting for about a week, I visited him at his place after he picked me up from college. He’s 23, and honestly, I felt completely comfortable with him for the first time in my life. I genuinely smiled and laughed, we kissed and cuddled, and I had the best time ever. It felt amazing, like I just melted in his arms. But after three days, I admitted that I really liked him, and then he ghosted me. I tried reaching out a couple more times, but he ghosted me again each time. He mentioned having commitment, attachment, and anger issues, and I had this urge to protect him. However, my friends pointed out that I needed to move on, so I hesitated but eventually re-downloaded the app. I met another guy, 21, who is really sweet and brought me flowers and chocolates, and I started developing feelings for him. But guess what? He’s still hung up on his ex and isn’t ready for any commitment. Honestly, I’m still not over my first guy, and now I’m feeling really lost. I could use some advice—what should I do?


Dating and Starting Relationships • 7d ago

I didn't receive a Valentine's gift from my boyfriend. Is it unreasonable for me to feel upset about it?

"I (20F) just celebrated my first Valentine's Day in a relationship, and I have to say, I was really looking forward to it. Watching my friends enjoy it in the past had me eager for that special moment with someone. However, when Valentine’s Day came, my boyfriend (20M) simply texted me a casual 'Happy Valentine's Day,' explaining that only kids celebrate it and that we’re too mature for such things. I had gotten him a gift, but after hearing his response, I felt too embarrassed to give it to him. So, I played it off and agreed with him, saying it was just a kids' holiday. But truthfully, I expected a bit more. Has anyone else been in a similar situation? How did you deal with it? Was I out of line for having those expectations? EDIT: I just remembered something that's been on my mind. We recently had a small argument, and he mentioned that we’re not like other couples because we don’t talk on the phone very often. As a final-year student, I’m always swamped with assignments and seminars, yet I still find the time to text him regularly and call him 2-3 times a day. Hearing his comment made me reflect on our Valentine's Day experience. If we're different from other couples, then why skip the Valentine’s Day celebration?"


Dating and Starting Relationships • 7d ago

What should I do?

Last October, a girl from church whom I had a slight crush on asked my sister for my number. She expressed that she wanted to get to know me better and was interested in me. Initially, everything seemed to go smoothly as we chatted and connected over text. A week later, I suggested going on a date, which she agreed to. However, when I checked in about her availability for that Sunday—since she was busy with the worship team—she said she couldn't make it, so we rescheduled for the following week. But when I reached out that Friday to confirm if she'd be free, she started coming up with excuses, mentioning concerns about being seen together by others from church. This shift confused me since she had seemed enthusiastic before, so I decided to cancel to avoid complicating things. Fast forward two weeks, and we hadn't communicated much. I asked her out for coffee before a youth event, but she replied that she felt something was off and didn’t want to meet up. In January, after she finished her finals, I reached out to see how she was doing, letting her know I was there to listen. She responded with, "Hi, thank you for your concern. As I mentioned before, I’m not looking for a relationship right now and I'm not ready for one. I’ve realized I don’t have feelings for you; what I felt was just admiration. I really appreciate your kindness, but it’s making me uncomfortable. It’s probably best if you don’t wait for me because I don’t want to hurt your feelings. There are many other girls who would be a better match for you." I can't shake the feeling that I rushed things and crossed her boundaries, and now I feel terrible about it. She's the only person I genuinely like, and I had said I was willing to wait for her. What should I do now? Can I do anything to help the situation, or should I simply wait for the right moment to apologize?


Dating and Starting Relationships • 8d ago

I'm a 23-year-old female and I have feelings for my coworker and friend, who is 22 and male.

I (23/F) have been friends with someone we'll call “Jake” (22/M) for about seven months. We both work in the same department and grew closer after a night out where we danced together and he was really attentive. At the time, I interpreted his attention as friendly, since we were just starting to get to know each other. He often asked if I was interested in dating anyone, but I wasn't because I had just moved to town and wanted to focus on settling into my new job. I returned the question, and he mentioned that he had recently gotten out of a relationship and wasn't seeing anyone, although he didn’t clarify if he was looking for anything. After that night, our friendship continued to deepen. Over the next few months, I began to sense that Jake might have romantic feelings for me, as coworkers started to notice our flirtation and closeness. They made jokes about us, which left me perplexed. Eventually, I picked up on signs that he might like me—he gave me frequent compliments, we often found ourselves sitting close together, and he joked about my height by playfully putting his arm over my head. There were also moments when it felt like he was leaning in, making comments that hinted at something beyond friendship. I tried not to overthink things and just enjoyed our friendship. However, after I recently injured myself and struggled to walk properly, Jake showed a thoughtful side by making sure the car seat was pushed all the way back to accommodate me. That gesture struck me as sweet and sparked feelings I didn’t expect to have. But now, I’ve noticed that Jake seems a bit distant. When we talk, there’s an awkward tension, but neither of us brings it up. I can't tell if he feels the shift too, but I definitely do. Sometimes I give him rides, and it can be silent and uncomfortable. I’m feeling confused about how to proceed. I like Jake and value our friendship, but I’m unsure whether to address the changes in our dynamic or give him some space. On one hand, I sense there might be something between us, but on the other, I worry about making things awkward if he isn't interested or never was. Should I talk to Jake about my feelings, risking an awkward situation, or should I wait it out? If I decide to bring it up, what should I say? I don’t think he has any idea how I feel, and I’m uncertain about his feelings towards me.


Dating and Starting Relationships • 8d ago

A 24-year-old man who is still a virgin.

Hey everyone, this is my first post on Reddit, so I apologize if my writing isn't the best. To get straight to the point, I'm a 23-year-old guy who's still a virgin. I've asked a few girls out that I was interested in, but unfortunately, they've all turned me down. I'm not sure why, and it's been weighing heavily on me. I've reached a point where I can no longer brush off these feelings. I don't really have much contact with girls at all. The girls I went to school with didn't show any interest in me, and the few from other classes that I tried to ask out also rejected me. It’s not like I haven’t put in the effort; I've actually approached them, but it's always ended with a "no." I think I've faced at least ten rejections at this point, and I'm starting to worry that I'll never find someone. Do you have any insight on what might be going wrong? Is it something to do with my appearance, or did I come on too strong? I don't believe that's the case, but I'd really appreciate any advice you might have. Thank you!


Dating and Starting Relationships • 8d ago

Did I give him the wrong impression?

**TL;DR: I feel like I may have led him on, and I need some advice.** I (20F) was talking to a guy (20M) for about 3-4 weeks, but it ended because we saw things differently on several topics. I now feel like I may have unintentionally led him on, even though that was never my intention. He was the one who expressed interest first, so I decided to explore where it could go, and I communicated that to him. As we got more comfortable, I shared what I liked about him, but I wasn’t ready to pursue a relationship just yet since I thought it was too soon. Around week two, while we were getting cozy and cuddling, he mentioned wanting to kiss me. I wasn’t ready, as I wanted to be sure about my feelings before taking that step. He encouraged me to make the first move, wanting me to feel comfortable. However, he frequently brought up the idea of kissing and compared it to my previous talking stages. I explained that from those experiences, I learned that I didn’t want to rush into anything unless I was serious about the person. Eventually, I sensed that we weren’t on the same page, but I still held out hope that things might work out. However, he began to make me feel guilty for not having kissed him, which led me to do it just to end the conversation. Afterward, I felt uncomfortable and expressed to him that it shouldn’t have happened like that—that I felt pressured. He insisted it was never his intention to make me feel that way, but he got upset when I didn’t word things more softly, which I understand, but I wanted to be honest about my feelings. We decided to end things after one last meeting, during which he kissed me despite our previous conversation where I had said I wasn’t ready for that. That day, he asked if I ever had feelings for him, and I admitted I wasn’t sure because I wanted to take my time getting to know him. I later realized that my lack of physical attraction was holding me back, although I appreciated many of his other qualities. When I conveyed this, he seemed hurt and interpreted it as me calling him ugly, which wasn’t my intention—just that I wasn’t physically attracted to him. Now I feel guilty, thinking I might have led him on when that was never my goal, but I also recognize that he placed undue pressure on the kissing aspect. I asked him directly if he felt led on, and he said no, yet he continued to act hurt afterward. After we stopped talking, he invited me to hang out as friends, but I declined, explaining why it wouldn’t be a good idea. His reaction was to get upset, which felt quite childish to me. I don’t know what to do next. Can someone please give me some advice?


Dating and Starting Relationships • 8d ago

She told him, "You're just a friend..."

I'm a 23-year-old male and she's a 20-year-old female. We met in college, and I've had a crush on her for quite a while. Eventually, I confessed my feelings, and while she didn’t get angry, she didn’t give me a clear answer either. I kept trying to reach out, sending memes about having a crush and similar things. Today, I asked her, "Will you be my valentine?" She responded by saying, "Sorry, you're just a friend to me, and I don't want to date a friend. Don't keep your hopes up about us dating." She’s the second girl I’ve been really interested in, and my feelings for her have grown from simply liking her to genuinely loving her. Should I keep pursuing her or just let go? I'm torn between my mind, which says to move on, and my heart, which believes she’s the one for me. What should I do? Is she hinting that I should try harder?


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