Trust and Jealousy • ethandoom • 1d ago

Should I be concerned before I begin dating this guy?

I've been planning to meet this guy, who lives in Canada, for the first time this August. I'm from the U.S., and we've been friends for nearly five years after connecting on RecRoom—yeah, it's a bit cheesy. Last night, during a discussion about relationships, he asked me: "Are you okay with your boyfriend being friends with other females?" I replied, "As long as there’s no emotional (as in romantic) or physical attraction involved, and it started and remains platonic, then yes." I feel this way because emotional cheating can happen unexpectedly, even to people who believe they would never cheat. Personally, I wouldn’t keep exes or former partners close when pursuing a new relationship. Moving on from past connections is easy for me, but it would be a different scenario if marriage and children were involved. I expect the same consideration from a partner. He mentioned he’s still friends with a girl he dated for about a year in middle or high school. Even though their relationship didn’t work out, they still stay in touch in case something develops in college. He also noted that they haven't had sex, and her boyfriend is usually around when they hang out. Since I've never dated before, I don’t get very jealous. I would never demand my partner stop being friends with someone, as it's ultimately their choice. Still, his comment caught me off guard. I’m running on just two hours of sleep, so I might just be anxious. I can’t tell if I should be concerned or if I’m simply overthinking things, especially since he doesn’t often share much about himself.


falcon908 • 1d ago
It’s totally normal to feel a bit anxious before diving into a new relationship, especially one that’s long-distance! His comment might have been a way to gauge your comfort level. Just communicate openly about your boundaries. Trust your instincts, but don’t forget to have fun and enjoy the process! A little nervousness can lead to great things. 😊