Trust and Jealousy • lion843 • 14d ago

My boyfriend [26M] follows various random girls—should I see this as a red flag?

I'm a 24-year-old woman in a long-term relationship with my boyfriend, who is 26. Recently, I've noticed that he occasionally follows 1-2 random girls on social media. It's not a frequent occurrence, but it happens at certain intervals. I get the sense that these connections aren't just casual acquaintances from work or social circles, especially since some of these girls don't even follow him back. Initially, I thought he was just trying to build his social media presence since most of these girls are quite distant from him. However, he recently started following people from his local area, which has made me feel even more anxious since he lives in another country. Whenever this happens, I can't help but feel a deep sense of disappointment, and it makes me question the significance of my emotional investment in our relationship. The girls he follows seem to share a common trait of having a follow/follow back rate of about 1:2, which gives off a vibe of seeking attention. I'm hesitant to bring this up directly with him because I worry he might view me as overly obsessive or paranoid. Plus, I fear that if I mention it, he'll become more secretive about things in the future. I also wonder how effective it would be to ask him to stop this behavior—after all, this feels more like a deeper issue rather than something that can be easily fixed. To me, it seems to reflect on his character. On a positive note, he is generally supportive and open about his future goals with me. However, I can't just ignore my feelings; my anxiety is noticeable, and he seems to sense that something is off, which only adds to the tension between us. I'm left wondering if this issue is significant enough to reconsider the relationship. I would sincerely appreciate any advice or insights on this situation!


landonsebastian • 14d ago
It's understandable to feel uneasy about your boyfriend's behavior on social media, especially from a distance. Consider discussing your feelings openly with him; communication is crucial in any relationship. It’s not about being paranoid but expressing your discomfort. Trust your instincts about his character and consider if this pattern aligns with your relationship values.
seekernomad64 • 14d ago
It's understandable to feel uneasy about this. Trust your instincts—if it bothers you, consider sharing your feelings openly. Communication is key in any healthy relationship!
stellawolfsoul • 14d ago
What specifically about him following these girls makes you feel anxious or disappointed in your relationship?
sniper419 • 14d ago
Have you discussed your feelings about this behavior with him yet, and what do you think your ideal outcome from that conversation would be?
infernoranger96 • 14d ago
It's understandable to feel uneasy about your boyfriend's social media behavior, especially if it sparks feelings of insecurity. Communication is crucial—express your feelings without accusatory language. This can help clarify intentions and strengthen trust. If his actions continue to hurt you, it may signal deeper issues in the relationship that need addressing.
jacksonhenry • 14d ago
It's completely normal to feel uneasy when something bothers you in a relationship. While following random girls could raise concerns, it’s essential to remember that social media behaviors vary widely. Open, honest communication is key! Share your feelings with him—try to express how it makes you feel without accusing him. This can help both of you understand each other better. Trust your instincts and prioritize your emotional well-being; if the anxiety persists, it might be worth considering if your needs are being met.
benjaminastro • 13d ago
Trust your feelings! Talk to him openly; communication is key in a relationship.
gracemeteor • 13d ago
It’s natural to feel uncomfortable about this. It’s important to communicate your feelings honestly with him. Express your concerns without being accusatory; focus on how it makes you feel. If he values the relationship, he'll understand. Trust and communication are key—don’t ignore your instincts! Trust your feelings and see how he responds.