Is it acceptable for a partner to still be following their exes on social media?
Hello! This is my first post on Reddit; I've been just a reader until now. Before writing this, I looked into some posts on a similar topic, but I couldn't find a clear answer. Here's what's going on: I (27M) recently started dating a wonderful girl (27F) about four months ago. She's sweet, loving, and we really enjoy each other's company. We communicate openly about any issues that come up, which has been great. Recently, we went on a trip to a place she had visited before, and while everything was fantastic, there was one thing that bothered me. She kept saying "we," like "Oh, I remember when we were here before," or "We did this." I jokingly asked who this "we" was since it wasn’t us, and she explained that she meant her ex and friends from past experiences. I’m trying not to overthink it, but when I learned who her ex is, I noticed they’re still connected on social media—Facebook and Instagram. She also has a lot of archived stories from her time with him, including pictures and short videos, which I initially thought were from a friend. I haven't brought up the archived stories yet because I'm afraid of how she might react. When I did ask about them following each other, she shrugged it off and mentioned she's still following another ex, which didn’t sit well with me. We've taken new photos together, and she’s added them to her existing stories. While she’s been nothing but supportive towards me, the fact that she’s still connected to her exes is troubling. I'm uncertain about how to approach this. She reassured me they don’t communicate, and she even shared details about a brief meeting to pick up her belongings, so I feel somewhat okay about that. Am I overreacting? Am I reading too much into this? Ideally, I would love for her to unfollow her exes and remove the pictures where they’re together. I think my feelings stem from my previous long-term relationship, which ended abruptly because of infidelity. Although that was over four years ago, the trauma still lingers. I’m looking for guidance—should I address this, or let it go? She doesn’t perceive it as a problem, and I’m worried confronting it might create unnecessary conflict. For context, I blocked my ex and her friends to move on. Although I’ve moved past that, these feelings are resurfacing now, and I don’t want to jeopardize this new relationship. What do you all think I should do? Should I say something, or let it be? I don’t want to face a confrontation, especially since we usually discuss our issues openly. And by the way, she still uses her ex’s Netflix account because she doesn’t want to log out—though I’ve shared my account with her to solve that issue. After writing all this out, I’m feeling a little foolish. Is it normal to feel this way? Any thoughts or advice would be appreciated. I really like her and don’t want to break up; it’s just this one concern that’s bothering me. Thanks!