My boyfriend, who is 28, mentioned that he's beginning to feel less love for me, a 28-year-old woman.

My boyfriend is set to leave for a month on Wednesday, and last night he said I could go out with my friends. So, I went to dinner with them, intending to be back in a couple of hours. However, after a few drinks, my plans changed, and I ended up going to a couple of bars. I struggle with a drinking problem and have been trying to stay sober, but I tried to drink like I used to. Unfortunately, I lost control and ended up getting very drunk. My friends had to call him to pick us up. When I woke up this morning, he was packing his things and getting ready to leave. He told me I was a mess, a disaster, and that I’m going to ruin everything in my life. He expressed that he’s beginning to love me less and that all I do is mess up. His words made me feel terrible about myself, and I felt both embarrassed and ashamed. I apologized and admitted that I had made a mistake. He accused me of lying about just going to dinner and claimed that I intended to stay out all night. After he left, I texted him, asking if he could come back tonight, but he said he was spending time with his family and wouldn’t return. When I asked if I would see him before he leaves, he said he would think about it and suggested I shouldn’t chase him, telling me to "be respectful"—which I didn’t fully understand. I told him I’d give him space, and I haven’t heard back from him in a few hours. I know I messed up, but his reaction feels really harsh. I have a history of being in toxic and abusive relationships, and I don’t fully understand what a healthy relationship looks like. Is this a typical response?