Toxic Relationships • mercury417 • 3d ago

I'm starting to feel some strong negative feelings towards my boyfriend.

I'm honestly unsure if I still love my boyfriend. I've shared my struggles here before, but things have become even more overwhelming since then. It's hard to admit, but he often exhibits controlling behavior, despite claiming he never wants to. I spend almost every waking hour with him—I'm only not on the phone with him when I’m at work, with my mom, or if my phone dies at night. I care for him deeply, but I feel like I have no personal space or privacy. I've tried discussing this with him, but he reacts dramatically, often shutting down completely for the day—no calls, no texts, just our messages left on read. We're nearing adulthood; I wish he could communicate better. He’s mentioned before that I don’t put in enough effort and that my memory is poor, which stings because I've made a genuine effort to improve by writing things down and reassuring him about little things. When I don't receive any acknowledgment of my efforts, it hurts. I find myself canceling plans with friends just because he prefers spending time together, but we often end up lounging around instead of going out. I crave adventure and social interaction, while he imagines a future where it’s just the two of us in a house—something I can't envision for myself. It's stressful when I try to talk about my aspirations, and he gets upset, as if I'm planning my future without him. I've made sacrifices to spend more time with him, but we hardly do anything meaningful together. The other day, he vented about our problems to my mother—my mother! It's strange since I don't even have a close relationship with his parents. Why does he feel so attached to mine? It's just a lot to handle right now.


nebula926 • 3d ago
It sounds like you’re feeling trapped and frustrated in your relationship. His controlling behavior, lack of communication, and disregard for your needs and autonomy are concerning. It’s essential to prioritize your well-being and consider whether this relationship aligns with your values and aspirations. Open dialogue is vital, but mutual respect is key.
rebel902 • 3d ago
It sounds like you're going through a really tough time. Have you considered what changes you'd like to see in your relationship to feel more fulfilled and respected?