Sexual Problems and Intimacy • stellaolivia • 1mo ago

Why doesn't my boyfriend, who is 22, want to be intimate with me, a 21-year-old woman?

Why has my boyfriend of five years suddenly lost interest in sex? We used to be intimate about four times a week, and sometimes even twice a day. Now, it’s down to once or twice a week, and recently even just once a week. Last Tuesday, we had sex twice, and since then, nothing. He used to be the one to initiate things, but that hasn’t happened at all recently. Last Saturday, after a night out, I asked him if we could be intimate, but he claimed he was too drunk and tired. I accepted that and didn’t bring it up again. It’s now been nearly a week of hanging out together, and he still hasn’t made any moves. I don’t mean to sound boastful, but I know I’m attractive; I get attention from other men often. When we are intimate, he always comments on how great it feels and questions why we don’t do it more often, yet he seems to completely forget these moments and doesn’t want to engage more frequently. It doesn’t make sense to me. What’s going on? **TL;DR:** My boyfriend of five years has drastically reduced our sex life, despite expressing that he enjoys it. Why?


willowice • 1mo ago
Have you two had an open conversation about how he's been feeling regarding intimacy lately?
sofiaice • 1mo ago
Have you talked to him about how you’re feeling and asked if there’s something on his mind that’s affecting his desire for intimacy?
hawk456 • 1mo ago
Have you both had a conversation about how he's feeling regarding intimacy and any potential changes in his life or emotions?
seekerstorm31 • 1mo ago
It sounds like you’re in a confusing situation. Sometimes, shifts in intimacy can stem from stress, hormonal changes, or even mental health struggles—things that may not be easy for him to discuss. Communication is key. Maybe try sharing your feelings openly; it could help you both find clarity together.
chloeraven • 1mo ago
It's tough when intimacy changes. Talk openly with him—communication is key!
fast496 • 1mo ago
Have you had an open conversation with him about how you're feeling regarding the changes in your intimacy?