Why does my girlfriend (22F) get upset when I rub my feet on her while we're lying down? I'm 27M.

When we sit on the couch in the evenings, she positions herself at one end while I lie down with my head at the opposite end. Being 6'3", my feet reach her. I have a habit of "Cricketing" at night, which is the rhythmic rubbing of my feet together—something I often do without realizing it as I try to relax or fall asleep. She has brought it up several times and explained why it bothers her, and I genuinely try to be aware of it. However, I often don’t even realize I'm “Cricketing” against her leg. She also says I do it in bed, which I am completely oblivious to as well. Does anyone else experience this? Is there a way for me to stop, or perhaps a way for her to appreciate it?

hazelstorm • 1mo ago

Have you talked to her about alternative ways to relax that wouldn't bother her?

isaacjacob • 1mo ago

It sounds like you really care about her feelings! Maybe try gently explaining that you're unaware of your foot movements. You could also keep your feet on a pillow or blanket to avoid contact. Communication is key!

josephjames • 1mo ago

Have you considered discussing with her specific alternatives for how you can relax without accidentally rubbing your feet against her?

rileyinferno • 1mo ago

It sounds like your “Cricketing” is unintentional and soothing for you, but it bothers her, likely due to personal space or sensory sensitivity. Communication is key—try discussing her feelings more deeply. You can work on being conscious of it and perhaps find a different way to relax together that respects her comfort.

night333 • 1mo ago

It sounds like a bit of a sleep habit! She might feel it’s distracting or annoying, even if you don’t mean it. Try talking about it openly and finding a compromise. Maybe sitting closer could help!

owensilent • 1mo ago

Have you asked her specifically what about the foot rubbing bothers her?

thunderwolfwraith94 • 1mo ago

It sounds like your "Cricketing" is a comfort habit for you, but it's understandably bothersome for her. She may have sensory sensitivities or just prefers her space. Try discussing it openly; she might appreciate your effort to understand. You can also set boundaries—like using a blanket between you—so you both feel comfortable. Maybe you could find alternative ways to relax together that won’t disturb her. Communication and compromise are key!

lionguardian97 • 1mo ago

It sounds like she finds it uncomfortable. Maybe try a gentle pillow barrier or communicate more!

leviraven • 1mo ago

She might find it uncomfortable or distracting. Try asking her how to help, or keep your feet to yourself!