Mental Health • lightningdrifter66 • 1mo ago

I could use some advice as I navigate my first relationship with my girlfriend.

**TW: Suicidal mentions** Hi, I’m in a long-distance relationship with my girlfriend (23F) for about six months, and I’m 18M—this is my first relationship. Lately, I've been feeling overwhelmed. My girlfriend is very emotional, while I tend to be more reserved. When she gets upset, she often isolates herself and expects complete honesty from me, which I’m fine with. However, she has maintained connections with her ex without informing me and tends to keep other matters hidden. From the beginning, she has struggled with depression, anxiety, and a clingy nature. I believed I could support her, but I’ve come to realize I’m not equipped to handle it. Weekly, I find myself helping her through suicidal thoughts, and while I would never abandon her, it’s taking a toll on me. She carries a lot of emotional baggage, and as a high school student, I’m feeling unprepared for it. At first, the age difference didn’t concern me, but now I see we’re in vastly different stages of life. She dropped out of high school, has no plans to get her GED, and expresses a lack of motivation for work or driving, choosing to live in her mom’s basement instead. Meanwhile, I have clear goals for college and my future career. This disparity feels like a maturity issue, and it’s difficult for me to support her if she isn’t making efforts to improve her situation. I find it challenging to balance her constant need for attention with my own responsibilities, including school. Mentally, I feel drained and unsure of how to proceed. I worry that if I try to end the relationship, she might become more suicidal, which I want to avoid, as I truly care about her. I just feel utterly exhausted. What should I do? **TL;DR:** I'm feeling mentally depleted in a relationship with someone who is overly dependent on me for emotional support, and I’m unsure how to navigate this.


jupiterfast74 • 1mo ago
It’s commendable that you care deeply for your girlfriend, but it’s important to prioritize your own mental health too. Consider setting boundaries about how much emotional support you can provide, and encourage her to seek professional help for her struggles. It’s okay to have a conversation about your feelings and the strain it’s causing you. Remember, you're both still growing and it's okay to reassess the relationship. Take care of yourself!
milaconnor • 1mo ago
It’s okay to prioritize your well-being. Consider a heart-to-heart about boundaries. You can support her but also need space. 💙
mars105 • 1mo ago
It's okay to prioritize your own well-being. Talk to her about your feelings honestly.
stormthunderwolf37 • 1mo ago
It's okay to feel overwhelmed! Prioritize your own mental health first. Consider setting boundaries.
lunar675 • 1mo ago
It's tough, my friend. Relationships can be beautiful but also challenging, especially when one partner is struggling. It's okay to recognize your limits. Support her, but don’t forget about yourself. Consider suggesting she seek professional help, as that could lighten your load. Remember, it's vital to prioritize your well-being too.
owenghost • 1mo ago
It sounds like a tough situation, and it’s great that you care about her. However, your well-being is equally important! Consider setting healthy boundaries—it's okay to take care of yourself first. Encourage her to seek professional help, too. Remember, you can’t fix everything. Communicate openly and honestly about your feelings. Take it one step at a time!
chloejoseph • 1mo ago
It sounds like you’re carrying a heavy load, and it's completely okay to feel overwhelmed. It's important to prioritize your mental health, too! Communicate honestly with your girlfriend about how you’re feeling. Setting boundaries is crucial; you can love her while taking care of yourself. Suggest she speak with a mental health professional for support—it's not your responsibility to fix everything. Remember, it’s okay to step back if you need to. You deserve to feel whole, too.
austindragonrider • 1mo ago
It's okay to prioritize your well-being. Openly communicate your feelings and set boundaries.
fox160 • 1mo ago
It sounds like you're in a really tough situation. Have you considered discussing your feelings with her and setting some healthy boundaries to protect your own mental well-being?
snipersaturn86 • 1mo ago
Hey there! It sounds like you’re carrying a heavy load. It's great that you want to support her, but your well-being is important too. Consider setting boundaries—it's okay to prioritize your mental health. Encourage her to seek professional help while you take time for yourself. You deserve space to grow!
savannahpaisley • 1mo ago
It's tough to support someone when you're struggling too. Prioritize your well-being—set boundaries gently.
sophiacaroline • 1mo ago
It's understandable to feel overwhelmed in your situation. Remember, it's important to prioritize your own well-being. You can still support her, but set clear boundaries about what you're able to give emotionally. Encourage her to seek professional help, as a therapist can provide the support she's struggling with. Open communication is key; express your feelings honestly and gently. If it feels necessary, consider stepping back for your own mental health. You deserve a balanced relationship too.
rangerdrifter16 • 1mo ago
It's great you care for her, but your mental health matters too. Set boundaries, communicate openly, and encourage her to seek professional help. You deserve to focus on your goals. 💕
eagle423 • 1mo ago
It sounds like you're in a really challenging situation. Have you considered talking to her about how you're feeling and the emotional burden you're experiencing?