Fresh romance and challenges

Sure! Here’s a rewritten version of your text: --- I [25F] and my partner [23NB], who have been together for two years, recently discovered that we both have a crush on someone [22M]—for the sake of this story, I’ll refer to him as "Crush" and my partner as "P." To give you some background: P and I have been discussing the idea of opening our relationship for over six months since we both felt a desire for someone else. Although we never acted on it initially, I brought up the possibility of a third person, and we agreed to see how things unfolded if we met someone we both liked. I've had some poly relationships in the past, but they were toxic and ultimately disappointing experiences. P has also had polyamorous relationships and is fully comfortable with the concept. We agreed to take things slowly, and P was okay with remaining exclusive for as long as I preferred. Fast forward to about a month ago when we met Crush. I immediately felt a strong connection with him—he's attractive, kind, stylish, and incredibly cool. We hit it off remarkably well, sharing the same vibes, music tastes, and laughter. We spent hours playing video games, watching videos, and even doing each other's hair, sometimes just the three of us, sometimes with friends. P and I shared how massive our crush was on him and decided to continue seeing him to explore where it could lead. We even asked Crush if he felt similarly, but he responded that he saw us as "just friends." That was okay, though; we both love him dearly because he’s just that wonderful (considering P and I have trust issues with men due to past traumas, having a crush on one felt unsettling yet right because he’s so lovable). So, we kept it at the notion of a friendship with a crush. A week ago, P went to visit their parents, who invited Crush and me to join them in the countryside while they were away. At first, Crush hesitated but ultimately decided to come. When I got that text saying, "We’re going to P’s," I can’t express how thrilled I felt! Crush and I took the train together to meet P, and it was such a fantastic time. We had long, poetic walks under the stars, shared many laughs, and felt truly alive. He even initiated some physical contact, like holding us while we admired the full moon from a mountaintop—it was so romantic. We spent the time having fun and sharing some intimate moments. By the second day, however, I sensed some confusion from Crush regarding his feelings, even though we agreed to keep things friendship-focused despite our strong feelings for him. On the final day, the bond between the three of us deepened, and I began to realize that my feelings for Crush were more than just a crush. P felt the same way. We took the train back home and decided to go to Crush’s place after. Long story short, we were cuddly and affectionate, and I kissed Crush, to which he responded positively. This led to an intimate moment among the three of us, although I experienced a little panic attack during it. After talking through my feelings and the traumas that triggered it, he was incredibly understanding and sweet. We had another intimate moment the next morning, which was delightful. We stayed an additional day (yesterday, as I write this), but later that night, I felt a wave of jealousy and panic. I worried that P and Crush might initiate intimacy without me, which I know they would never do; they’re very respectful. I think it’s just my deep-rooted issues surfacing. I shared my feelings with them, and they reassured me, but this morning, I found myself feeling a strange mix of anger and sadness. I don’t want to jeopardize this amazing situation we have, as Crush is genuinely into both P and me, and we share a lot of affection for each other. I’m terrified that my insecurities will push them away. Please, I could really use some guidance. I love them both so much, and I feel utterly lost. Ugh!