My boyfriend, who is 32, and I, a 20-year-old female, have been having some disagreements recently. I'd appreciate an outsider's perspective on our situation.

My boyfriend and I have been together for nine months. When we first started dating, I sensed that things progressed too quickly; we went from getting to know each other to being in a relationship in just two weeks. After only a week of dating, he told me he loved me, but I felt it wasn't right to reciprocate at that moment. I wanted to truly mean it before saying those words, which upset him and made me realize how fast our relationship was moving. When we met, he had just come out of a toxic eight-year relationship with his ex-girlfriend, who had cheated on him multiple times. He assured me he had never cheated, but I couldn't help but wonder if he was truly ready for a serious commitment after such a painful experience. As our relationship deepened, I often felt that his feelings for me were more obsessive than genuine love. He had liked me for a while before gathering the courage to ask me out. I thought his fixation might be partly due to our age difference—I'm 20, and he's 32. When he learned about me through my mom's boyfriend, he was told I have a good job and that I'm a bit reserved. While I believe a woman's worth isn't defined by such traits, I felt he saw them as advantages that shaped his view of me. In our relationship, I was consistently a supportive presence for him, but he rarely listened to my thoughts or feelings. He would often interrupt me, showing little engagement with the emotional aspects of our connection. To his friends and family, I sometimes felt more like a trophy than a true partner. Given his history with a toxic relationship, I never thought he would betray my trust. However, a few days ago, I felt an odd urge to check his phone, and I discovered messages to another girl in which he seemed to be pleading for her to meet. At that time, we had been dating for three months. When I confronted him, he adamantly denied sending those messages. To verify, I texted the girl from his phone, posing as him, and asked if she recalled their last encounter. She replied that it had happened about six months ago during warm weather, but he insisted she was lying. This isn’t the first time a situation like this has arisen; previously, it turned out to be false. He argues that this instance is just the same, claiming she’s lying about someone taking his phone. When he called her, asking why she was being dishonest, she said, "Don't involve me in your issues. You know what you did. You’re being unfaithful and don’t want to face the consequences. Just leave me alone." I have a big heart, and when he lost his home last December, I didn’t want him to be left homeless, so I invited him to stay at my house. Now we’re living at my mom’s place together, and I’m feeling lost. I see him every day as he cries and insists he’s innocent. I want to believe him, but deep down, I suspect he’s not telling the truth. It’s confusing because he’s starting to make me doubt my own instincts. I even question if the previous instance of suspected dishonesty was real. All I want is for him to be honest with me. Each day is filled with tears and anxiety, mainly because he insists everything is fine, even when the evidence suggests otherwise. He promised to find the person who texted her, but after four days, there's been no proof. He wants me to disregard what I know, but I can’t shake the feeling that he’s lying. He finds ways to twist my thoughts, redirecting my focus to the good moments we’ve shared, which makes me feel guilty for questioning his feelings. I feel trapped in this situation. While I know I’m not literally confined—no one can force me to stay—it’s perplexing to realize I’m being manipulated and still find myself affected by it.