I'm a 41-year-old woman seeking advice about my relationship with my boyfriend, who is also 41. I'm feeling uncertain and could use some guidance. Any suggestions?

**Buckle Up**—I want to begin by saying that I genuinely consider myself a kind person who gives a lot to others without expecting anything in return. I typically don’t voice my frustrations, but here we are. I (41F) have been in a relationship with a guy (41M) for the past two years. He initially swept me off my feet, claiming to be a successful business owner and a six-figure earner who could manage on his own despite his visual impairment. He assured me that he was looking for a serious relationship, something he had never found before, and my friends even vouched for his character. Having spent much of my life financially supporting my boyfriends and their families, it was refreshing to meet someone who didn't seem to need that kind of help. At the time, I was in a job I despised, although I enjoyed the work itself; it was just the people I struggled with. We started dating in January 2023, but by March, something felt off. I found out that he had been seeing other women since the very beginning. While some approach dating like a game, I see it differently. For me, dating is about assessing whether someone is marriage material; otherwise, there’s no reason for me to label them as anything more than a friend, and I don’t sleep with my friends. He was aware of my stance from the start but chose to disregard it, continuing to cheat throughout our relationship. I even caught another woman at his place once. We attempted to reconcile through counseling, but I eventually stopped when it became clear he had no intention of being faithful. I also ceased contributing to his household because, frankly, why should I? I know I should have walked away, but after receiving repeated apologies, I felt stuck. Our lack of chemistry in the bedroom and his substance abuse issues, which he claims lead him to cheat, have complicated matters. I’ve told him that our relationship can only improve if he commits himself solely to me, but I keep finding evidence that he hasn’t changed. There are so many stories that illustrate this situation. Along the way, he has criticized me for not cleaning or cooking enough, insisting I’ve not been supportive. In reality, I do help out but have scaled back because it’s hard to go all out for someone who doesn’t reciprocate. I went from being his live-in girlfriend to more of a caregiver. I usually drop my son off at school and then prepare meals or take him out to eat, recognizing that he needs assistance. I might let his dog out or take her for occasional walks, but I stopped cleaning the house entirely. So, why do I stay? Honestly, I keep searching for a reason to remain in this relationship. We generally get along and enjoy each other's company—even when we clash over political issues, it rarely affects us. We share good times and affection. Yet, I’m missing the loyalty I need from a partner. Now to the core of my dilemma: I feel used, and when I withdrew the "relationship perks," suddenly I’m deemed "not enough" for him. He’s had many women come and go, seeming to live off him, but I am not one of them and never aspire to be. I’ve been self-sufficient since I started working at 14. It’s been a year since I’ve worked, and finding a job in the current market has proven challenging. You’d expect I could lean on him for some support, but I don’t; I even asked for gas money recently—why should I pay to drive someone who cheats on me? Cheating is a significant trigger for me. Growing up watching my parents betray each other, my childhood was shadowed by the lies their infidelities created. I refuse to share space with another woman for any reason. What should I do about this? Should I even continue trying?