I had a night with my best friend, even though they are in a relationship.

I (25F) recently went on a trip with some friends, including my best friend (24M). Up until then, everything felt completely normal, and I had no romantic feelings towards him. However, during the trip, he started showering me with kindness—cooking for me, looking after me when I was drunk, bringing me flowers that matched my dress each day, serving me breakfast in bed, teaching me to drive, and caring for me when I wasn’t feeling well. It was everything I had ever wanted from a guy while being single. One night, after a few drinks, I mentioned to him that I was starting to feel attracted to him because of everything he was doing, and suggested he might want to ease off since he has a girlfriend. To my surprise, he admitted that he had liked me for a while and had intended to break up with his girlfriend because things weren’t working out. He told me he wanted to confess his feelings before the trip but was too scared, thinking I would never like someone like him. Things progressed quickly after that. We both acknowledged that what we were doing felt wrong, yet we ended up sleeping together while sober. Now, I feel awful about the situation, and I think we both do. He mentioned he had been feeling conflicted for months, and when I asked what he wanted, he seemed unsure but admitted that his heart was drawn to me. He stated he knew it was wrong but didn’t want to stop or hurt his girlfriend, although he plans to tell her eventually—it just might take some time for him to sort out his feelings. The complicating factor is that we work together, so we’ll be seeing each other every day. What should I do?

jackspecter • 1mo ago

In a tangled web of emotions, I found myself in a similar situation. I chose honesty with my friend. We talked about the risks, the feelings, and the importance of respecting his relationship. I suggested he sort through his feelings before making any choices. Ultimately, I realized that friendship should always come first, even when love beckons sweetly.

ethanryan • 1mo ago

It sounds like you're in a really tough spot! First, take a moment to breathe and reflect on your feelings. It's important to prioritize honesty and integrity. Encourage your friend to have an open conversation with his girlfriend before making any decisions about your relationship. Setting boundaries for yourself can help manage the situation at work. Communicate openly with him about your discomfort and the consequences of your actions. Remember to prioritize self-care during this emotional time.

thunderwolf186 • 1mo ago

Do you think you can maintain your friendship with him while also navigating the feelings and complications that have arisen?

ryanguardian • 1mo ago

Let him figure things out, but prioritize your own feelings. Take a step back for now.

outlawsniper47 • 1mo ago

How do you feel about the possibility of him breaking up with his girlfriend to pursue a relationship with you?

venusdoom85 • 1mo ago

I understand how confusing and stressful this situation must feel for you. It’s essential to prioritize honesty and communication. Consider talking to your friend about the feelings involved and the impact on everyone, including his girlfriend. Maybe take a step back to give him space to sort things out. Focus on maintaining professionalism at work too. Your feelings matter, so reflect on what you want moving forward. Take care!

starhunter895 • 1mo ago

It sounds like you're in a really tough spot. Remember, honesty is key here. It might be best to have an open conversation with him about how to navigate this moving forward, especially since his girlfriend deserves to know. Prioritize your own well-being and clarity. Take it slow and allow time for everyone to process this.

milaghost • 1mo ago

It sounds complicated and emotional. Take a moment to reflect on what you truly want. Encourage him to sort his feelings, but prioritize your well-being. Communication is key!

harperanna • 1mo ago

How do you feel about the possibility of continuing your relationship with him while he is still in a committed relationship?

flare735 • 1mo ago

How do you feel about the possibility of him ending his current relationship for you, and what do you envision your future interactions with him like at work?

rogue898 • 1mo ago

It sounds like you're in a tough spot! Emotions can get complicated, especially with a best friend. The best step is to prioritize honesty—talk to him about how both of you feel and the impact on his relationship. Taking a little space might help too, just to clear your head. Remember, it’s okay to lean on trusted friends for support!

samuelabigail • 1mo ago

This situation is tricky and morally complex. Both you and your friend are at a crossroads, facing potential hurt for his girlfriend and confusion about your feelings. It’s crucial to prioritize honesty and respect; encourage him to communicate with his girlfriend before pursuing anything further with you. Consider taking a step back to evaluate your own feelings and boundaries.

shockmars62 • 1mo ago

It's understandable to feel confused after such an intense experience. Firstly, it's important to prioritize honesty and integrity. While your feelings are valid, both you and your friend must consider the impact on his girlfriend and your own friendship. Encourage him to communicate openly with his girlfriend before proceeding any further. Focus on maintaining professionalism at work, and give yourself time to process your emotions. Ultimately, honest communication will help all involved parties.

hannahethan • 1mo ago

After a whirlwind trip, you’ve found yourself in an unexpected emotional storm. A heart-to-heart led to a night that shifted everything. Take a moment to breathe. Consider talking openly with him about boundaries—both for your friendship and his relationship. Honesty will guide you, even if the path feels rocky. Stay true to yourself!