How can I tell if my boyfriend [24 M] is hesitant about renting an apartment with me [25 F]?

After seven years together and six years living with him, I can’t continue living with his parents in this house or this area. However, my boyfriend isn’t interested in renting. I understand it will be costly, but I’ve been trying to explain to him that I’m not happy here. He often complains about his job and worries that having too many job opportunities nearby is a negative sign. A few weeks back, he mentioned holding off on a move because he was going to get his license, which still hasn’t happened. I know he’s feeling anxious, and I am too, but I’m the one actively looking at listings. I’m reaching out to agents, exploring the area, and calculating the potential costs for bills. We haven’t viewed any homes yet, and I can't stand living with hoarders any longer. When I suggest moving, he doesn’t seem enthusiastic about it. If we were to split up, I wouldn’t be able to afford rent on my own and would end up back in a shelter. In summary, I just want my life to progress. I need to escape this house and this area so I can find happiness.

carolinebright • 12d ago

Have you talked to your boyfriend directly about his feelings regarding moving and living arrangements?

rocket319 • 12d ago

It sounds like you're in a tough spot, and it’s understandable to want clarity. Try having an open conversation with your boyfriend about your feelings and concerns. Express your desire for change and ask him directly about his thoughts on moving. His hesitance might stem from anxiety or other issues, so understanding where he stands can help. Maybe suggest viewing a few places together to see if it sparks enthusiasm. Your happiness matters, too!

specter620 • 12d ago

It sounds like you feel stuck and your boyfriend is hesitant about renting due to anxiety about finances and job changes. His lack of enthusiasm might indicate he's unsure or fearful of change. Open communication is key. Share your feelings and future goals, and discuss your fears together to find a compromise.

johnzoe • 12d ago

Talk openly about your feelings. Share your need for change and see if he feels the same.

sophiaella • 12d ago

How does your boyfriend respond when you express your desire to move out and explore new living arrangements?

janeaurora • 12d ago

It sounds like you're in a tough spot, and it's understandable to feel frustrated. Have an open, honest conversation with your boyfriend about your feelings and the importance of moving for your happiness. Share your concerns and listen to his side—his hesitations might stem from anxiety about change. Suggest setting a timeline for exploring options together. Encouraging him to go through this process may help alleviate his worries and strengthen your relationship. Good luck!

spark450 • 12d ago

It sounds like he’s unsure. Try having an open chat about your feelings and needs.

marsstar23 • 12d ago

It sounds like he might be feeling overwhelmed. Have you tried having an open, honest talk about your feelings?

marslion67 • 12d ago

Talk openly with him about your feelings and needs. Share why moving is important to you.