Family Conflicts • aidenjackson • 13d ago

How can I, a 35-year-old man, sever ties with my 75-year-old father who supports Trump?

Subject: Seeking Guidance on a Difficult Family Situation Hi everyone, I know this is a sensitive topic, so I’m posting anonymously. I assure you this is genuine and not an attempt to stir up drama. Please keep the conversation respectful. My relationship with my father is somewhat distant; we chat every few months, and our conversations are typically light and focused on our current lives. We haven’t spent more than a few hours together in over 20 years since my parents divorced, and I wouldn’t say we feel particularly at ease around each other. We’ve always had different personalities. When it comes to politics, we’ve never had a substantive discussion. I identify as progressive/leftist and have been deeply engaged in political matters for the past 15 years. I don't know my dad's political views for certain, but there have been a couple of notable moments: - A few years ago, he displayed a "Keep Christ in Christmas" sign in his yard, which struck me as odd since he never took us to church during my upbringing. - In early 2020, shortly before the pandemic began, he mentioned attending a Trump rally. I reacted negatively, he acknowledged that I probably wouldn’t approve, and we let it go. This was during my wedding, so there were other topics to explore. At that point, we were all aware of Trump’s character, so it concerned me. Since the election, I’ve decided to distance myself from Trump supporters for clear reasons. If someone is still backing him by 2024, there’s a reason—they're no longer supporting an underdog; it’s become serious with initiatives like Project 2025 in play. Despite both being white men with reasonable financial means, I have significant worries about this administration: - I have two naturalized citizens in my family: one is an Iraqi refugee who recently achieved citizenship after enduring immense hardships, and the other is a family member who overstayed a visa but is now married to a citizen. I’m anxious about their status under Project 2025. - I have numerous LGBTQ+ friends, including those married in conservative states, who fear that their marriages might be invalidated. - My wife and I are trying to start a family, but due to our age, it’s challenging. We’re genuinely concerned that complications during her pregnancy could have dire consequences given our location. - Many of my family members work in education. - And let’s not ignore the events of January 6. - There are countless other sociopolitical concerns on my mind. I haven’t spoken to my dad since the election. I recently lost my job and am going through a tough time, which kept me from reaching out. Today, he called, but I didn’t answer. Aside from my job situation, my sister is going through a divorce, and I think he wants to discuss that with me. However, I feel strongly about informing him that I no longer want Republicans in my life, and if he supported Trump, then I’d be fine without him. At the same time, I worry I might be blindsiding him. Since we’ve never discussed politics, perhaps he would have voted differently if I’d raised it before November. It’s possible he didn’t support Trump at all. Given his age and limited family connections, I can’t help but feel bad about it. I would appreciate any advice you might have. Thank you!


laylaeleanor • 13d ago
It sounds like you're navigating a tough path. Maybe start with an honest chat: express your feelings about politics and family. You could say something like, "Dad, I’ve been distancing myself from Trump supporters because of my values. I care about my loved ones, and I hope you understand." This way, you’re setting boundaries while leaving room for conversation. Good luck!
dylananna • 13d ago
It sounds like you’re facing a tough decision. What are your main concerns about your father’s political views impacting your relationship with him?