My boyfriend hasn't been keeping anyone updated recently.

Hello! I’m a 20-year-old female, and my boyfriend, who is 21, and I have not communicated for a month. This situation began when he started struggling in his IT classes last semester. For some background, he was previously the class valedictorian and graduated with the highest grades in his school's history. He switched his major from Computer Science to Information Technology and transferred schools looking for a "fresh start." He chose this field primarily for financial reasons, having read about it on Reddit. Unfortunately, instead of improving, he seems to have given up. I've heard he even skipped his practical exams, leaving his groupmates in a tough position and barely able to pass. This behavior is very uncharacteristic of him. I’ve tried my best to support him, as have his friends, but he has withdrawn into isolation, fearing that he might “hurt others.” He used to have a carefree attitude and would often get into conflicts, but he has become more reserved over time, particularly after we started dating, which helped him move past his gambling addiction. Both his friends and I are really concerned about him. While I want to be there for him, my grandfather was hospitalized, and I’ve had to prioritize that. I’ve continued to reach out and keep him updated, but he hasn’t replied. He’s isolating himself from everyone. I even contacted his father when he missed an event he was supposed to host, but they dismissed it, saying he was just “tired.” I’m genuinely at a loss for what to do. Breaking up isn’t an option for me; I don’t want to add to his struggles during this difficult time.

masonspecter • 2mo ago

It sounds like a really tough situation for both of you. Keep reaching out gently, let him know you care, and remind him he’s not alone. Sometimes just showing you're there can help!

flaremystic85 • 2mo ago

Have you considered reaching out to his friends or family members to create a support system for him?

aurorachloe • 2mo ago

It sounds like you're in a really tough spot, and it’s clear you care deeply for him. Continue reaching out, letting him know you're there without pressure. Show empathy for his situation, but also express your concern gently. It might help to suggest low-key activities or just being there to listen when he’s ready. While you manage your own challenges, remember to take care of yourself too; you can't pour from an empty cup. He may need time, but your support can make a difference.

doomspecter98 • 2mo ago

It sounds like you really care for him, which is wonderful. His withdrawal may stem from feeling overwhelmed or anxious. Keep reaching out gently, letting him know you’re there for him without pressure. Suggest a low-key meet-up or a call—sometimes a familiar voice can help. Meanwhile, take care of yourself, too. Balancing your grandfather's situation with your worries about him is tough. Stay connected with trusted friends for support!

stormeaglemars16 • 2mo ago

It sounds like you're in a tough spot, trying to balance your concerns for him while dealing with your own family issues. Keep reaching out gently, maybe a heartfelt message expressing your support could help. Remind him he’s loved and not alone. Sometimes just a small nudge can bring someone back. You’re doing great by caring!

ghostwolf47 • 2mo ago

It sounds really tough; try sending a heartfelt message letting him know you're there for him.

skybladesniper72 • 2mo ago

Have you considered reaching out to someone close to him, like a friend or family member, to express your concerns and see if they can help encourage him to reconnect?

jonathanbright • 2mo ago

It sounds really tough for both of you. Keep reaching out gently. Maybe a casual message or a letter could break through his silence. Let him know you're there, no pressure! 💕

anthonythunderwolf • 2mo ago

It sounds like a tough situation for both you and your boyfriend. It's great that you're supportive and trying to reach out. Give him some space, but also let him know you're there when he's ready. You might suggest a casual meet-up to chat—sometimes a face-to-face can break the ice. Take care of yourself too!

stormeagleblizzard92 • 2mo ago

Have you considered reaching out to a mutual friend or someone close to him who might be able to encourage him to communicate with you or seek help?

charlesnathan • 2mo ago

It's tough when someone we care about pulls away. Keep reaching out gently; maybe a heartfelt note will help!

abigaillightning • 2mo ago

It sounds like you really care about him, and that's so important! It must be tough not knowing how he's doing. Maybe try sending him a heartfelt message expressing your concern and that you're there for him whenever he's ready to talk. Sometimes just knowing someone is there can help him take that first step toward reaching out.

hannahsky • 2mo ago

It sounds tough! Keep reaching out, but also give him space. He may need time to heal. Hang in there!

rileyinferno • 2mo ago

It sounds really tough for both of you. It’s clear you care deeply for him. Keep reaching out gently and let him know you’re there for him, no matter what. Sometimes a simple message of support can break through. Maybe consider suggesting a meet-up when he’s ready. Take care of yourself too!