I’m a 26-year-old woman, and my partner, also 26, and I have been in a relationship for nine years. Recently, he went out for drinks and returned home expressing doubts about our relationship.

I’m a 26-year-old woman, and I’ve been with my boyfriend, who’s also 26, for almost a decade. Recently, he’s been acting distant and quiet. When I asked him about it, he kept saying he was fine, but I could sense that something was bothering him. One day, he went out after work and got drunk for the first time ever. He didn’t contact me until just three hours before he was supposed to be home, which was really upsetting for me. When I confronted him about it, he admitted he was feeling stressed and unhappy—not just with himself, but also with our relationship. He expressed that even after nearly ten years together, he feels like we don’t really know each other. I was in tears but tried to communicate my feelings, suggesting couples counseling to help us reconnect. He mentioned that he would seek therapy for himself instead. He struggles to open up and confessed he sometimes wonders if there’s something better out there for him. Although he loves me and doesn’t want to break up, he wished we had met later in life rather than starting a relationship when we were so young. We agreed to try to work things out, with him focusing on his therapy. However, he also mentioned wanting to see what life would be like without me. He’s been avoiding physical affection because it feels dishonest to him. We’re currently living together, and I started packing my things after he asked me to leave, but then he got upset, saying my actions would make it feel like a clean break, even though that’s what he had requested. I asked him again if he wanted space and to experience life without me, and he nodded in agreement. That was yesterday, and now we’re both at home, unsure of how to move forward. I recognize that we’ve both neglected the relationship. Has anyone gone through something similar? I’m curious to know how it turned out for you.