Breakups and Divorces • outlawfox76 • 1mo ago

I'm a 19-year-old female, and I'm starting to lose feelings for my boyfriend, who's 20. Should I break up with him or wait it out?

I've been with my boyfriend for nearly three years. We started as good friends in high school and eventually began dating. We both attended community college, and now I've transferred to my dream university. Since my school is local, we're not in a long-distance relationship, but it feels like we might as well be. He is truly amazing—one of the best partners I could ask for. He loves me deeply, treats me with kindness, and for over two years, my feelings for him were incredibly strong. However, since starting university in September, our time together has decreased, and our conversations have become less frequent due to our busy schedules. I find myself not missing him like I used to when we weren’t hanging out, and sometimes I feel annoyed when I receive his texts and don’t feel like responding. He hasn’t done anything wrong, so I feel guilty for my feelings, but I’m beginning to wonder if I still love him. I know that if you fall out of love, the right thing to do is to break up, but that would hurt us both deeply. He doesn’t have many close friends and views me as his main support, especially during tough times. I worry about how he would handle a breakup, given his self-esteem issues. Plus, I’m anxious about regretting my decision later on since he plans to transfer to my university next year, and I wouldn’t want him to rethink that choice—it’s a great school for his major. I’m considering two options: ending our relationship now to avoid stringing him along or waiting to see if my feelings change, as they might just be a reaction to the stress of a new school. I really need some advice!


nebulagalaxy89 • 1mo ago
It sounds like you’re in a tough spot, and it’s completely normal to question your feelings as life changes. It’s important to honor your feelings, even if they come with guilt. Open, honest communication with him about how you're feeling could be a good start—this might provide clarity for both of you. If you find your feelings don’t return, it may be kinder to part ways now rather than later. Trust your intuition, and remember that it's okay to prioritize your happiness too!
galaxyfox222 • 1mo ago
Have you had a chance to communicate your feelings and changes in your relationship dynamics with him?
andrewlogan • 1mo ago
Trust your feelings! If you’re unsure, communicate openly with him and see what happens next.
star889 • 1mo ago
It’s tough to navigate feelings like this, especially after three years together. If you’re feeling unsure, it might be worth having an honest conversation with him about where you both stand. Sometimes, talking it out can help clarify your feelings. No need to rush—take your time to figure out what’s best for both of you!