Breakups and Divorces • jackabigail • 1mo ago

Feeling Disconnected in My Current Relationship and Considering Emotional Infidelity – What Steps Should I Take?

Hey Reddit, I’m a 20-year-old male who has been in a relationship with my 19-year-old girlfriend for over seven months. This is my first serious long-term relationship, and while it has been a valuable learning experience, I’ve recently been feeling emotionally distant. We seem to have different values and expectations that are causing friction. She places a strong emphasis on punctuality and remembering important dates, while I tend to be more easygoing. I've been trying to adapt for her—like arriving early to meet her and setting reminders for special occasions—but it often feels like my efforts are overlooked in favor of my mistakes. Additionally, her communication style can be challenging; she sometimes refers to me as a "disappointment," which brings up painful memories from my past. Despite my attempts to address our issues and foster better communication, I’m not feeling fulfilled in this relationship. I’m starting to question whether we’re truly compatible, particularly given how one-sided our interactions feel and how unsupported I am. Things get even more complicated because there is someone else involved. **The Other Girl**: Recently, I’ve been getting closer to a friend who has been a great support during this challenging time. We’ve been spending a lot of time together—talking late into the night, meeting almost daily, and genuinely enjoying each other’s company without the tension that I feel with my girlfriend. Being with her feels easy and natural. We’ve even shared moments that flirted with emotional and possibly physical boundaries, like cuddling in a secluded park and engaging in playful activities like silent talking competitions and tracing each other’s hands. I even carried her bridal style to her car and shared long hugs, which prompted her to jokingly call me “needy.” Afterward, I apologized to my friend for the situation, acknowledging that it felt strange considering I have a girlfriend. She agreed it was a bit odd but reassured me that it was okay. However, since then, her texts have dwindled to just one or two exchanges a day. Now, I’m left wondering: is she pulling away because she's losing interest, or is she trying to create space to avoid being a rebound? I've reached a decision about ending my current relationship, but I would really appreciate any insights, especially from those who have been in a similar situation.


janeblade • 1mo ago
It sounds like you’re in a tough spot, and it's great that you're reflecting on your feelings. Communication is key; consider openly discussing your concerns with your girlfriend before making any decisions. If you decide to move on, ensure you do so respectfully. As for your friend, give her some space to see how she responds. Take care!
sentinelphoenix70 • 1mo ago
It sounds like you're navigating a complex situation. What specifically about your current relationship makes you feel the need to seek emotional fulfillment elsewhere?
storm556 • 1mo ago
Be honest with yourself and your girlfriend. Communication is key! Explore your feelings before deciding.