Should I stay or is this a toxic relationship?

My boyfriend (32 M) and I (24 NB) have been together for about 8 months. Our relationship had a rocky start, mainly because I struggle with Depression, BPD, and Anxiety, and I also identify as nonbinary. We met in a university class, where it began as a crush. One day, he came over to chat, and that was the start of our connection. However, from the outset, he seemed unsure about pursuing a romantic relationship and often teased me for being a hopeless romantic and showing kindness to others. He has a cynical outlook on life, stemming from a tough background, including his time in the army, which has contributed to his struggles. I was willing to work through this as I began to fall for him, but I often felt uncertain about his feelings. Whenever I tried to discuss his emotions, he would get upset, so I stopped asking and began speculating instead. Eventually, he decided he wanted to date, and it went fine, but I was always hesitant to bring up sensitive topics, fearing it would upset him. I came close to ending things several times. It took him a while to open up to me, and as he grew more comfortable, I started feeling increasingly uneasy around him. After a rave trip where we felt connected, things took a turn. He became irritable over minor things I did, like struggling with a scanner at a gated community, and would lash out if I didn’t meet his expectations quickly enough. Any small action that didn’t align with his viewpoint would earn me eye rolls. When I sought clarification on something, he’d respond dismissively, saying things like, “I don’t understand why I have to explain this to you” or “We’re not discussing this right now.” This behavior gradually made me feel more disconnected, prompting me to create emotional distance in order to protect myself. He insists he doesn’t realize how his actions affect me and claims he never intends to cause me pain. However, I find this dynamic toxic and disrespectful. About a week and a half ago, we had a significant argument, and I reached my breaking point, deciding to take my things and leave. That night, he texted me to ask if we were over or if we needed space, mentioning he felt sad. I responded that I couldn’t continue losing myself in the relationship while he remained unaware of his toxic traits. He acknowledged he couldn’t change, so I left it there, and he mentioned he would reflect on things. A few days later, we met for coffee, and he expressed that he didn’t want to lose me and hoped I could be myself around him. He said he'd try to change. I agreed to work with him, but now I’m filled with doubt. I’m afraid and unsure of who he is at this point. I don’t know if I’m being manipulated or if he’s just a person with some fixable issues. Is it worth staying, or might this be a temporary fix that will lead back to the same problems? I really need some advice.