Feeling Unjustly Treated After Disagreement with My Boyfriend

I had a major argument with my boyfriend about a week ago, which almost felt like a breakup. It was one of the worst fights we've ever had, and for a while, I thought it was the end. To give you some context, my boyfriend, 31, has bipolar 1, and things have been pretty challenging lately. He often lacks basic common sense and life skills, so it feels like I'm constantly taking care of him—reminding him to take his medication or to clean up after himself, and it’s exhausting. One morning, we had a particularly bad argument that escalated quickly. He said some really hurtful things (and I definitely contributed to the chaos as well). In these heated moments, it’s easy to lash out at each other verbally, often as a defense mechanism rooted in my own past traumas. I’m aware of my faults, and I go to therapy to improve how I handle my emotions and conflicts. I’m really trying. However, it feels like he doesn’t realize basic things, like when his medication isn’t working well, he should schedule a doctor’s appointment. Sometimes it feels like I’m the one parenting him, and I’m tired of that dynamic. Anyway, on the day of our big fight, it was supposed to be his brother's birthday dinner. He completely twisted the story of our argument when he told his family, claiming I “used him as my personal punching bag,” which was such a misrepresentation of what actually happened. Yes, we had a physical exchange where we both pushed each other, and I know that’s unhealthy, but he made himself out to be the victim while portraying me as abusive. He even told his family that I have an alcohol addiction, which is far from the truth—I do drink, but not in an excessive way. I can’t help but think he wanted to turn them against me. Fast forward to a few days ago, at his child’s birthday party. We had been slowly working on our relationship and trying to resolve our issues. But unbeknownst to me, he had fed his family a bunch of falsehoods about me. When I arrived at the party, I greeted his brother’s wife, and she responded with a disgusted expression and said, “Ummm no thank you,” before walking away. I felt completely blindsided and realized I had walked into a hostile environment without knowing it. Am I being dramatic for thinking this is outrageous? It seems incredibly unfair to be put in this situation without knowing he was painting me as the “bad guy” to his family, all while inviting me to a family gathering. I would have never attended if I had known there was animosity towards me, and it's frustrating that I can’t even defend myself or share my side of the story. I feel embarrassed and disrespected. Should I be upset with him? It’s hard not to feel like this relationship may not work out after all.