I [female, 19] and my boyfriend [male, 19] have recently discovered that he experienced sexual abuse during his childhood.

We've been together for five years, enjoying what seemed to be a wonderfully happy and healthy relationship filled with laughter and love. We truly care for each other. However, a few months ago, I discovered that he has been struggling with a porn addiction throughout our entire relationship. After discussing it, I made it clear that I was uncomfortable with this behavior, and we agreed that he should seek therapy for it, though that hasn't yet happened. I've found evidence of this on his phone several times, and after reiterating my boundaries, I recently discovered some particularly disturbing material involving sexual videos of underage girls. This revelation left me heartbroken because he is not the kind of person who would typically engage in such behavior—he has always shown respect and compassion toward these issues. When I brought it up to him, I was uncertain about how to proceed. I asked if something traumatic had happened to him in the past, and he admitted that it had. He has never shared this with anyone and has kept it deeply suppressed. He's not ready to discuss it further, but I would like to know the best way to support him and encourage him to speak to a therapist about it. He has a wonderfully supportive family who would stand by him, as would I. However, I find myself grappling with how to address this. I’m deeply troubled that he has been consuming this kind of content since a young age, and I worry about our comfort level around children, especially our nephew. Living with him and his family, who have become my family too, complicates the situation. His exposure to sexual assault in his childhood seems to have triggered this addiction, along with other negative experiences like older teens showing him inappropriate videos and encouraging him to engage in sexual acts in their presence. I’m at a loss about how to approach this sensitive situation. We envision a future together and have discussed wanting kids, but I’m concerned about how I will ever feel secure knowing all of this. If you have any advice, I would greatly appreciate it.